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Thread: Wish me luck, please..

  1. #1
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    Wish me luck, please..

    Sorry to post this here, but I feel that I am among friends in a way, here. I have spent the last Twelve months becoming a more and more full time carer for my mum, who is 99. I in no way resent this, but has become harder and harder to do. I have been fighting with bureaucrats over her care, seems that a legally blind, deaf, urinary incontinent woman who cannot get out of bed is a low priority to our Aged Care people. Meanwhile, the headlines are dominated by SSM, Energy and Citizenship. Is anyone governing this country?

    OK, that might fall foul of the Mods, but I hope it doesn't, as it is NOT political, and should not be relegated to CA. It is a statement on society, if in fact we have one any more.

    Yesterday, I took my wife of 25 years for a scan, for a condition that has been scaring me for only a week, but it IS scary. We went from a CAT scan locally to the ED of Maroondah Hospital in about 30 minutes, and she is still there. I have no way of knowing if I am ever going to bring her home. I hope that I do. We never had plans, we came together a bit late and broken for that, other than to grow old(er) together. We have great kids ( youngest is 32, so maybe not "kids" ), none together. But, we all love each other, and are a family.

    I am posting this in hope: my personal hope is obvious, but I hope that others realise their mortality and get on with life. I didn't, and now it may be too late. No, I'll rephrase that: I didn't ever do what I really wanted, and neither did Jan. She is a mother of three wonderful people, has loved and is content. I brought less to the relationship, and have regrets.

    Make the most of your time, folks, it won't last as long as you think.

    Once again, I am sorry. It has been emotional, but I am going to post this before I chicken out.
    ​JayTee

    Nullus Anxietus

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  2. #2
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    Best of luck mate, and I hope your wife comes out the other side unscathed. Don't forget, we're all just a keyboard away if you need to talk
    The Phantom - Oslo Blue 2001 Td5 SE.
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    You worry me sometimes Muppet!!


  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disco Muppet View Post
    Best of luck mate, and I hope your wife comes out the other side unscathed. Don't forget, we're all just a keyboard away if you need to talk
    Thanks for reading my ramble, Muppet, and double thanks for your thoughts. It' sa little lonely here ATM.
    ​JayTee

    Nullus Anxietus

    ​Getting involved in discussions is the best way to learn.

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  4. #4
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    Hey John,

    You are right.... you are among friends. If you need a chat flick me a PM with your number....

    Hope things turn out Ok.... times like this the human brain has a nasty habit of coming up with worst case scenarios......well I know mine does.

    Hopefully the wizards at Maroondah will find things aren't as grim as you think....

    Hang in there mate...
    Mark

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  5. #5
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    Life is short.
    Nobody knows that better than a son or daughter with sick Parent.
    I hope your wife comes home,,,
    "How long since you've visited The Good Oil?"

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  6. #6
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    Yes John, you can be a chicken but you are not alone in that regard..

    We all fear different things...

    I got asked to look after a friend when I stopped working early last year... None of us knew he was in the late stages of Alzheimers, so by November last yr, I could no longer cope with him...

    He is the last of his generation in his family, now I am putting up with the gold diggers causing grief... At the same time as finding out that I am lucky to have lived past 25 and now into my 50's, i am still going...

    Talking about chicken, if it was not for my kids(and grandchildren) I would have taken a one way ticket, knowing what was in store for my future now...

    But hey, no regrets.. We all passed up opportunites, no point crying over them... Just enjoy every minute from now on, if you can make plans then do so, if you never complete those plans, oh well you tried, thats what counts now...

    Chin up and if you need a private conversation so you can swear and get things off your chest, your more than welcome to chat with me...

    All the best to you and yours...

  7. #7
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    You've got my number, John, anytime mate. My thoughts are with you and Jan, all the best.
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  8. #8
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    There's always someone listening mate
    The Phantom - Oslo Blue 2001 Td5 SE.
    Half dead but will live again!

    Nina - Chawton White 2003 Td5 S
    Slowly being improved

    Quote Originally Posted by Judo View Post
    You worry me sometimes Muppet!!


  9. #9
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    Funny thing about this place.. I have to balance so many things in the day to day, I really only have the family to bounce off, and, as most of you will know, that only leads to more bouncing, so I thank you all. Sometimes close is too close, and sometimes the distance we have becomes close enough. Good folk, all of you. I thank you.

    Yes, Ian and Mark, a talk may be in the offing, but not now. Right now I need to stop drinking and get some sleep so thay I can be of some use tomorrow, but I am so wired I dunno if I can.

    However, unlike Fakebook, I knew that I had real friends here. ................ If she comes home on Thursday with a clean slate, don't hate me, OK?
    ​JayTee

    Nullus Anxietus

    ​Getting involved in discussions is the best way to learn.

    2000 D2 TD5 Auto: Tins
    1994 D1 300TDi Manual: Dave
    1980 SIII Petrol Tray: Doris
    OKApotamus #74
    Nanocom, D2 TD5 only.

  10. #10
    cuppabillytea's Avatar
    cuppabillytea is offline Loud Mouthed Rat Bag Gold Subscriber
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    I wish you all the best of luck John. Hope Jan proves it was nothing to worry about.
    All the very best.
    Cheers, Billy.
    Keeping it simple is complicated.

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