I lost my dad....RIP Papa.....

[stevo68]

Hey all,

As some of you may have known....5 months ago my dad was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. We thought he may have had years to go.............he passed away last Thursday. Suffice to say it was not a nice way to go. The day I found out, I quit smoking and haven't had one since. He quit when he was 50...it got him 20 yrs later.

The best part was myself and siblings, his wife and best mates were able to be with him every day. For myself, I went and saw him just over 3 weeks ago at his home...that afternoon he went into hospital and he fought to the very end with just one lung working. I'm still haunted by those last hours and still very lost as we spoke every day.

Luckily I have had great support from my mates and family......Sharlea deserves a medal as I have been a mess. Telling the kids was one of the hardest things I will ever have to do.........as they doted on their grandpa and vis a vis.

I guess the reason for this post is for the following "Stevoisms". One is to say out loud how awesome my dad was and how my life won't be the same without him :(...I remain truly gutted.

If you smoke....find a reason to quit........it is an insidious way to go and terrible for loved ones to watch...especially children and grandchildren. If like me you have smoked.....I will be getting myself checked each year. As dad said...he has had every part of his body scanned etc...........except "my ****ing lungs" in his words :).

The thing that has impacted the most is that at the very end....regardless of wealth or position.......all that matters is family and friends. Make amends or offer the olive branch.......I did with my sister over this and it was worth it.

The cliche...life really is to short...is so true. Dad at 70 had it all..........and it's made me realise....70 really isn't that old and there is plenty of things that can be done and life to live.

This photo was taken at what will now be the last Fathers Day I will have with dad. 32 days later he was gone......we thought we had years.......

https://www.aulro.com/afvb/images/imported/2011/10/865.jpg


Also I would like to apologise to anyone where I may have upset them. The last 5 mths have been some of the toughest...the last 3 weeks some of the worst I have experienced.....but also some of the best. Having tossed in my job a few months ago...allowed me some valuable time with Dad...although going to an interview the day after he passed was one of the best "performances" I have done :).

I see life differently now.........so whilst I am lost and a mess........Stevo will be back in the ensuing months ready to tackle the great outdoors again. As a final note.....don't let life pass you by whilst making plan's......do it now :). Also love your family, love your friends and love yourself.......that's the last time you'll get that sort of mush out of the 'Anti Nance Man" :D,

Regards

Stevo

[nice1guv]

Condolences Stevo.

Very sad to read about the passing of your Dad.

You speak of him with such respect, he must have been a great man.

[bee utey]

My deepest sympathies to you Stevo. Losing a close member of the family is always hard. My mum had a smoking related stroke at 68, she's still alive but a shadow of her former self. It sucks.

One day when your grief has abated we can get back to sparring...

Keep safe mate.

[drivesafe]

Hi Stevo and condolences from all of us.

[brownrangie]

Stevo

Our deepest condolences from us as well and your words are a great reminder of how we should all be living.

Pete and family

[NOZ]

Sorry to Hear Stevo my deepest condolences , I will read this to our 16 year old nephew who is smoking to be like his mates.

[sheerluck]

Deepest condolences Stevo.

Having lost my 59 year old father in very similar circumstances last year (though over a much shorter timeframe - 11 days from diagnosis of cancer to death), I know how hard it is.

Family don't last forever, get every moment in with them while you can.

[Killer]

Sorry to hear about your Dad, Stevo. And thanks for the Stevoisms.

Mick.

[isuzurover]

Condolences Stevo :(

[Presto]

I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you lately Stevo, and admire your strength for posting this. I have no doubt you'll bounce back soon and look forward to a few beers with you around a GCLRO camp fire some time soon! :)

[Sleepy]

Sorry to hear of your loss Stevo. That's a great photo!:ohyes:

[Hendrik]

My deepest condolences Stevo.

[Bundalene]

Stevo, we send you our condolences also.

All the best mate, you must have some great memories to help you through this sad time. Your Dad looks like a real character!

Erich

[Tombie]

Stevo

Mate - My deepest sympathies...

Remember all the great times with a smile :)

[d3syd]

Deepest condolences:(. That's a wonderful photo to be treasured.

Thank you for your post, all of us should take on board your wise words.

If one can gain something valuable out of the depths of dispair, then you could say that all was not in vain.......

[LSD_AUTOMOTIVE]

I'm so sorry for your loss... That photo is beautiful, you can see how happy he is, in his eyes especially :)

Take it slowly, you'll get through this

[blitz]

my sincerist condolences Steve, I gave up smoking years ago, just wish i could get my son to give it up

[Ean Austral]

Stevo, My sincerest condolences and hope that as time passes the pain of loosing someone so special will ease..:(

Hope to see you sparring on soapbox in typical stevo fashion.:)

Cheers Ean

[ade]

hey steve sory for your loss, i am in a similar situation with my father, smoked all his life and now riddled with cancer in stomach lungs and brain. i also have children and dread having to tell them. I hope i can be as strong as you seem to be.

[p38arover]

My condolences. Steve.

[Hymie]

Sincerest Condolences mate.
I know how hard it is to watch someone go due to Lung Cancer, my Mum died a few years back from it.
I angry that despite knowing about the dangers, the Government uses the addiction as a cash cow.

[The ho har's]

Stevo condolences to all your family, a very sad loss for you

[Scallops]

Stevo - we're thinking of you and are always here if you need a friend.

[Rat]

Thank u Stevo for your openness. We r all thinking of u and make sure u ask if u need anything.....

[harry]

mate,
cant type much as the tears **** my vision and i dunno where the letters are,
[shiela's type, not blokes]:wasntme:
as you know we are with you,
chin up, and see you soon.

[awabbit6]

Sorry to hear Steve. Look after yourself.

[Timj]

Stevo, not good mate! Thoughts are with you. Hang in there it will work out in the end.

Tim.

[stevo68]

Thanks everyone for your words and pm's of support. I really ummed and arrred about putting up a post...but hey I am me afterall ;).....plus to be honest I am finding it hard speaking to people at the moment so I guess a way of getting some of how I feel out of my system. Soapbox Stevo is trying to work out who this Stevo is :(.

I still have hard days ahead with my dad's funeral on the weekend. Again thanks everyone it really means a lot to me and I am very touched,

Regards

Stevo

[Gaudough]

Stevo, I lost my dad 26 yrs ago when I was 22 to liver cancer. He was a diesel mechanic and mechanical fitter in WWII. He taught me alot about cars(Land Rovers) and today a lot I practice is due to the days spent working on cars with him while I was between 8 and 21 yrs old. I still think he is right with me when I am working on the Disco and often have little conversations with him about what I should do when I hit a problem.

YOU will never forget HIM, the tears and the pain will subside and be replaced with "boy, dad would have loved to see this" especially when I have used one of his old tricks to fix something and think "bugger me he was right."

It also teaches you how important you are to the people around you even if they don't seem to show it. Put in the effort, they love you and adore you!!

Regards Gordo

[Big Dog]

Sorry to hear, your brother from another mother is hear for you

[incisor]

thoughts and prayers are with you and yours steve...

[Shepp]

Mate sorry to hear about your loss. Shepp & family.

[stevo68]

Thanks again for all your comments and PM's. If you have a coldy handy...a glass of wine of a spirit....no pun intended...feel free to raise it at 8 pm tonight ( in an hour and a half) as it will be 1 week since my Dad passed. I really wish I could turn back time and see him one more time....love you Dad......crackin another Stella :twobeers:

Regards

Stevo

[Busman]

Stevo, My sincere condolences to you and your family.
You are certainly and family man, and have a great heart, and sure this has hit you very hard indeed.
It is always very hard to loose a parent, as l have been through the same when l was alot younger.
Always think of the great times you spent together, and when you think of those times, you will have a little smile of contentment & reflection for that moment.
All our very best from our family to yours.

[Fluids]

Hi Stevo. My sincerest condolences to both you and your family.

[digger]

Stevo,

I hope that things soon get easier...
my condolances to you and all your family,
he obviously was a great man and now is without the pain..

Digger



The Gift

I will never say goodbye to you my Father
cause I know this is not the end for us to see each other.
You will only be going to a place where there’s no pain nor suffering.
I am happy for you, for you will be with God.
For now we need to go in separate ways.

I remember how your arms hold me and give me strength.
You were always there to listen, love, and defend me in everything.
You were my very best friend.
In my triumphs you were always proud.

I’m very grateful and proud to call you my dad.
Here deep inside my heart you’ll always be.
I would give up everything I have just to hug you one more time.
I remember the last time I hold you’re hand and how you looked at me in the eyes.

If only I could turn back the time I would have never let you go.
I felt the world stops and my heart stop beating when they told me you’re gone…….

How I wish I was only dreaming.
Just like the rain; tears fell down from my eyes, I couldn’t speak for a while.
Thank you Dad….

For always understanding, listening , caring, and loving me for the rest of your life.
The greatest gift God gave me was YOU…….. my Dad…
I
t’s difficult to let you go but I must…
I must return the gift God gave me…
Till then;
See you in Heaven………


(Lia GOMEZ)

[SimonM]

Steveo - sorry to hear of your loss. Thanks for sharing some words of wisdom though as it often does put some things in perspective in times like these.

[disco_thrasher]

condolences Stevo :(, look on the happy times:) that where had

[scarry]

Sorry to hear your loss,condolences to you & your family.Things will only get better.I know it's a really difficult time to go through.

Lost both my wife's parents earlier this yr,so can feel your pain.

[stevo68]

Well we laid papa to rest yesterday.....a difficult day to be sure....though he would have been impressed with the turnout and the way it all went.

Now dad was a Mercedes man......at the time he had a AMG ML63.......so he called Land Rovers "North Shore Holdens" :o......luckily all my mates who came to support me.........drive Land Rovers :cool:. So there were many LR's at the service...with some people commenting was there a Land Rover convention in the area :D.

Anyway...one thing that struck me about the day was that realisation has hit home.......it is a terrible feeling and something...like many will have to come to terms with. Thankfully I have a great family....awesome mates and people on here who have helped with their thoughts and comments. Much honoured am I............

Regards

Stevo

[UncleHo]

My condolances to You and to your Family, I lost my father less than 12 months ago, his was age related,92+yrs ,but his loss is still noticed.

[bolts]

My condolences to you and your family Stevo, wishing all the peace in this time.