What is wrong with me?

[Stumpy1]

G'day all,
Warning this thread may hit hard but I feel it is my duty to confess my sins. My wife hates me. My kids dont see me.....I have a problem.

I buy a very tidy bog stock standard V8 Disco 9 months ago....

It started when I drove it home.

I stopped in at Supa cheap to buy a vanilla smelly tree. Walking past the oil/air filters shelf and I couldn't help myself (well, better to be safe than sorry).
That afternoon while under the car I noticed that the radius arm bushes were knackered so I flew down to my local to grab some. Walked to the counter with a complete underbody bush kit, a new Garmin UHF, antenna and underbonnet compressor! About to go out the door when the ARB Bull bar and rear bar combo stared me down.. I tried to walk around it and not look it in the eyes but my knees buckled and my debit card threw itself behind the counter.
Decided that the barwork looked crap with those poxy 235's so a date with the tyre shop was in order. I soon discovered that my new 33inch Micky T's demanded another thrashing of my hard earned on a 2.5 inch suspension lift, a two inch body lift.
Oh darn! my tyres rub the newly bushed radius arms so some new -25mm rims found their way to my house.
Bugger it all! now the tyres stick out to far so the keyboard was hammered and presto, new flares were on an aeroplane that night.
"You wouldn't beleive it darling" I said as I gently approached the now fuming wife.... The new tyres have made the gearing too long so I have to order a new crown wheel and pinion set for both diffs!
Ordering these was a mistake as I found a hot deal on an ashcroft rear diff lock (may as well... while the diffs apart).

AAAAArrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhh

Feel my pain anybody? You familiar with the feeling Is my guess.

Stumpy (broke and yelled at alot by the hand brake)

[rainman]

Hahaha! :D What a good story. I tend to have a little more restraint when it comes to forking out cash, so I end up making or doing things myself, and go slightly insane in the process because I always have ten jobs ahead of me.


James.

[mike 90 RR]

....wife hates me. My kids dont see me.....I have a problem.

I'll set em straight ... Invite them over to my place for a boat trip with a RRC ride as the tow ...

As soon as I open the shed to fetch the said gear >>>> Maaaaaate .. They'll think your a Dream boat :D

[newhue]

oohh seems like a pretty normal condition you have there.

I work on ALWAYS saving money, I ALWAYS get a deal on what I'm buy and it's heaps dearer elsewhere.

I point out how the necessary modifications help get the family cross the river, over the log, up that hill, or along the beach SAFLY. Regularly highlighting to her how others who have failed don't have what we have.

And of course, don't tell her half the stuff you buy, because she tells you virtually nothing of what she does.:eek:

[MLD]

I too have been certified. In July 2011 I bought a high milage TD5 110 for a reasonable $10k. Bog stock standard. The only modification was the EGR blanking kit. Within a week was the bull bar. Needed a winch, so I got one of those. The tyres were bald, why spend a lot of money on replacement tyres. Why not upgrade to 33" muddies. mmm 255/85's don't fit on the 5.5" rim. Yep found some disco 1 alloys cheap. Anyone want a set of 5 x 5.5" factory steelies?

First trip was to Mt Walker. Was shown up by a traction controlled D90 and a locked 300 Tdi. Leaving myself pitched on the rock step on the final assent. Yep, in went the MD rear locker and axles. Same time I replaced the tired (i justified them in my head) suspension with tough dog foam cells and springs for a modest 35mm lift. Other mechanical servicing like bearings, flanges, engine mounts, bushes etc (milage had caught up with some parts). A series of minor mods like snorkel, diff guards, steering guards bla bla bla

At this stage ownership 6 weeks and the cost of ownership had doubled.

A short while later I grew tired of the lag of the 33" on acceleration. Yep, a ECU remap.

I was happy for a few months with her new found performance and off road capability. A trip to Mt Airlie I found some shortcomings against more capable trucks. My mind turned to a front diff locker. After many months of procrastination I bought myself a belated xmas present. An Ashcroft automatic torque bias diff centre for the front. CV's and axles remain standard until my b'day in July. No one buys presents that I really want and I'm yet to find adequate persuasive words to convince the wife that modifications to the old girl is a legitimate present whatever the celebration.

There are so many more justifications that haven't made it to print and a few more replaced worn parts. A fly wheel, clutch and bearings replacement is an expense not soon forgotten.

I'm not sure how it happened and I don't have adequate fingers and toes to add the invoices together. At a hazard of a guess I've topped 3 times the original purchase price in 9 months of ownership.

Touch wood the engine, gearbox and transfer case are solid.

The wife and I have secret cupboards for those acquisitions just for us. Unfortunately mine are obvious when the new part blings in the sun. The best was the lift from the suspension and wheels. The wife at a modest 5' 4" now has to do the 'one two three' swing to get in. Still makes me giggle as she mumbles under her breath. Makes a middle aged man happy when she is wearing a dress.

The most recent comment from the wife was a suggestion to sell her to help fund the house deposit. I think the words "No way" passed my lips before she finished her sentence. I live in fear of the wife finding out how much investment sits in the driveway.

Would I do things differently, nup.

Celebrate your affliction and secret love affair with the "mistress".

cheers MLD

[Judo]

Pics or it didn't happen. :p

[Blknight.aus]

Yep found some disco 1 alloys cheap. Anyone want a set of 5 x 5.5" factory steelies?


cheers MLD

Yep... had I known you were after a set I'd have arranged a swap from my allys for your steels.

[33chinacars]

The most recent comment from the wife was a suggestion to sell her to help fund the house deposit. I think the words "No way" passed my lips before she finished her sentence. I live in fear of the wife finding out how much investment sits in the driveway.

Celebrate your affliction and secret love affair with the "mistress".

cheers MLD

Lets hope she never reads this forum:angel:

[newhue]

Lets hope she never reads this forum:angel:

or wright the dam thing off.

In our house if you are planning to keep and use the vehicle than the mods are ok. It's when that doesn't happen it starts to cut a bit.
or
wright the dam thing off

[harry]

for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction

i buy second disco, i buy her a tt,

i buy diff lock, i buy homewares and dinner out,

newton got it wrong,
it's not an equal reaction at all.

[Judo]

for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction

i buy second disco, i buy her a tt,

i buy diff lock, i buy homewares and dinner out,

newton got it wrong,
it's not an equal reaction at all.

This is a familiar story. :D

[Blknight.aus]

to answer the original question "whats wrong with me?"

you have at some point been afflicted with "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis." This disease generally results in massive atrophy of your wallets fund lining and if combined with "titathanascotspursestringirieum" will also lead to flagellation of the knuckles, forearms and in some cases the shins and feet in a subsidiary affliction referred to as "giving blood to the greaser gods".

Its not an easily cured disease and its symptoms are typically bought on in binges by having the results of prior bouts of "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" appear wasted when the victim is passed by a vehicle that appears to be superior (or operated in a superioir fashion)but is in a more standard condition whilst the victim is having moments of terrain enfowlment.

For some reason your previously possibly undiagnosed case of "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" (and this is not an uncommon occurrence the disease can lay dorment waiting to strike for scores of years if your personal conveyancing situation wont let it manifest) has lain dormant and has managed to cross evolve with the "itsworthdoingrightius" bug. The primary symptom of which is a lot of people viewing those infected with the "itsworthdoingrightus" bug as being a bunch of pedantic ****** who spend more time and attention on their conveyances than its worth. In my personal medical opinion the "Itsworthdoingrightus" bug should be allowed to manifest itself fully and the minor degredatoion it puts on the walled lining and personal time is completely justifyable by the increase in enjoyment that is returned by mechanical contrivances that you pass it onto.

I've seen a few cases of the results of the blending of the "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" and "itsworthdoingrightus" cases and typically it results in very safe and sound results that lead to the gradual elimination of the "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" bug. Someone who has had the symptoms your having will typically have a ride thats a couple of inches over standard height will have some form of traction aid a correct set of tools and filters in the garage, rated equipment and will display thought and caution prior to applying right foot motion, they also usually dont get into accidents of their own causing and will stand well back from dangerous vehicular tomfoolery when compared to people infected with just "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis".

Its also worth mentioning that on the whole most people inflicted with "itsworthdoingrightus" will be above the 18-25 age bracket and will own a landrover compared to those with "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" which seems to be contracted mainly by anyone who owns any other brand of four wheel drive.

[Stumpy1]

to answer the original question "whats wrong with me?"

you have at some point been afflicted with "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis." This disease generally results in massive atrophy of your wallets fund lining and if combined with "titathanascotspursestringirieum" will also lead to flagellation of the knuckles, forearms and in some cases the shins and feet in a subsidiary affliction referred to as "giving blood to the greaser gods".

Its not an easily cured disease and its symptoms are typically bought on in binges by having the results of prior bouts of "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" appear wasted when the victim is passed by a vehicle that appears to be superior (or operated in a superioir fashion)but is in a more standard condition whilst the victim is having moments of terrain enfowlment.

For some reason your previously possibly undiagnosed case of "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" (and this is not an uncommon occurrence the disease can lay dorment waiting to strike for scores of years if your personal conveyancing situation wont let it manifest) has lain dormant and has managed to cross evolve with the "itsworthdoingrightius" bug. The primary symptom of which is a lot of people viewing those infected with the "itsworthdoingrightus" bug as being a bunch of pedantic ****** who spend more time and attention on their conveyances than its worth. In my personal medical opinion the "Itsworthdoingrightus" bug should be allowed to manifest itself fully and the minor degredatoion it puts on the walled lining and personal time is completely justifyable by the increase in enjoyment that is returned by mechanical contrivances that you pass it onto.

I've seen a few cases of the results of the blending of the "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" and "itsworthdoingrightus" cases and typically it results in very safe and sound results that lead to the gradual elimination of the "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" bug. Someone who has had the symptoms your having will typically have a ride thats a couple of inches over standard height will have some form of traction aid a correct set of tools and filters in the garage, rated equipment and will display thought and caution prior to applying right foot motion, they also usually dont get into accidents of their own causing and will stand well back from dangerous vehicular tomfoolery when compared to people infected with just "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis".

Its also worth mentioning that on the whole most people inflicted with "itsworthdoingrightus" will be above the 18-25 age bracket and will own a landrover compared to those with "mymitsoytasansstuckagainitis" which seems to be contracted mainly by anyone who owns any other brand of four wheel drive.
Thanks Dave,

Your diagnotic skills amaze me! Along with having a great laugh at your scribe, the words are so true. It all makes sense and I no longer live in fear that I may very well have this for life.
I will look deep within, soul search if I must. I'll let this "Itsworthdoingrightus" completely develop into a full blowen, guiltfree, disgustingly satifying and outragously fun condition that it derserves to be.

Thanks for the explaination.

Now, what about this rash.....any ideas? lol

Stumpy

[shorty943]

Stumpy, depending on just where this rash is, it could simply be a mild alergic reaction to certain grades of Asian vinyl seating covers as found in Missanota types of psuedo off road vehicles.
It is quite easily remedied by the use of British quality vinyl seating as found in a certain product from a Sullihull manufacturer.
I fully concur with my learned college Dave on his succinct diagnosis of "Itsworthdoingrightus", an affliction we should not really regard as an affliction, but rather as a blessing, enjoy it to its fullest extent.

[ThoBar]

I fully concur with my learned college Dave on his succinct diagnosis of "Itsworthdoingrightus", an affliction we should not really regard as an affliction, but rather as a blessing, enjoy it to its fullest extent. Quote of the week/month/year!!!

[clubagreenie]

If it's based on cost, the wife's in the driveway and the mistress is in the house.

Unfortunately my "extension" budget went into a new engine and auto 6 months after purchase so it's been a slow trip. To the point of it's been 2WD for the last 6 months owing to affordability of a new front tailshaft.

I find golf a distraction, trying to find a wayward ball is more annoying than trying to get to some things under a rover.

[Tank]

I was about to follow in your footsteps a few years back with my 93 disco V8 Auto, got Graham Cooper to fit a Uni-Chip (total waste of money $1500).
Then I started to look around at all the Goodies that I wanted in my Disco, added up to around $16,000 +.
While browsing eBay one day there it was, a 93 Disco with everything I wanted, locking diffs , 4.11 gearing to suit the 12.5 X 33 x15 rims and tyres, 4L cross bolt motor, LR tank, etc, etc. For $8000.00, I rang the bloke in Canberra and was there an hour and a half later with the cash in my hand, sold the stock 93 Disco for $7000 and had the Disco of my dreams for less than half of what it would have cost just to buy evrything I wanted, pays to look for bargains, Regards Frank.