What NOT to share with kids while in the great outdoors !

[VladTepes]

Warning: This thread may be slightly off-putting to those who've just had, or are about to have dinner.

For everyone else - especially anyone who knows Mrs Vlad - you're going to love this story.

We went on a club day to Coochin Creek, and took our nephews, aged 4 and 8.

The 4 year old needed, at one stage, to go to the toilet for 'a poopie'.

Being the uncle, I took him across to what proved to be a drop toilet - the old -throw sawdust down the hole afterwards type.

Well, when Caleb saw this he suddenly didn't have the urge anymore. In his words "I don't need to... it's gone back inside now!" (I would have been rolling around on the floor with laughter had it not been for the surroundings!).

Later that day....

Caleb says the Mrs Vlad " I need to go to the toilet"

One of our fellow forum members adds "Looks like he already has" (or words to that effect,

Anyway it fell to Mrs Vlad to take the poor bugger back to the loos and do what (she tells me) was a horrible clean up.

By the clappers I was glad I flick-passed that one !


I envy all you people with kids NOT AT ALL !!!!


Cheers Vlad.

[kaa45]

It's Ok. They do grow out of it :D

[abaddonxi]

Can't wait for the replies on this one. That sounds like a pretty normal day.

A friend's kid took a bath in dirty engine oil. She came inside looking like one of those birds fished out of an oil slick.

Now that's a dirty job.

I worked out the week changed over a thousand nappies in the first month with the twins.:eek:

Cheers
Simon

[RobHay]

Our dog once drank 2litres of used cooking oil.
Went straight thru her. She was feeding 5 pups at the time...6 very slick dogs :D:D:D

Honest...Kids dirtying their pants is easy street :D
Imagine an adult with diarrhoea at the rate of 5 times per hour and no control :o
Not pretty :( and no fun :(

Jeez I love work when gasto breaks out :(:eek:

NM !.........Let ya in on a little secret........That is why God invented Fire Hoses....:angel::)

[cazzz12000]

myself and the wife went to melbourne with our then 2/2.5 year old boy and went for a trip to the zoo ,was walking around with child being given a shoulder ride and got this wiff of something putrid but thought nothing of it (being at the zoo and all)then not 30 seconds later felt this warm ooze(? ron)running down both sides of the neck.Bit browny/mustard colou, putrid smell,had overflowed the nappy and I now had it on my skin and clothes which needless to say both boy(got given to wife to sort out)and clothes came off and found nearest tap and got fripples at the same time.NOT HAPPY WITH THE BOY. Zacc

[MickS]

https://www.aulro.com/afvb/

You missed a bit Cheryl....:Rolling::Rolling::Rolling::Rolling:

[abaddonxi]

You know what's worse than waking up to someone vomiting on your head?

Waking up with both of them vomiting on your head.

And you get used to it.

:Vomit smiley:

Cheers
Simon

[JDNSW]

......
A friend's kid took a bath in dirty engine oil. She came inside looking like one of those birds fished out of an oil slick.
.......

I haven't had that, but about two years ago my then four year old grand daughter investigated the 20l drum I had just drained the County engine into:- "What's this stuff?" and before I could open my mouth or grab her, put her arm into it, up to the shoulder, went "yuk!" and wiped it off on her clothes - well, some of it, anyway.

John

[dobbo]

Just wait till he tries to clean himself like a big boy, first time success, second time success, you think the worst part is over till you walk into the bathroom after and find a scene straight out of a Rabbitoh's hotel room.

Out with the Domestos and the Gernie that day.

[Captain_Rightfoot]

I've got a story about this!

We're in a remote aboriginal community in WA on the canning called Punmoo (I think). Anyway we get there and want a top up. Fuel is only sold at certain times of the day so we wait around.

Then my daughter wants to do a number 2. There aren't any toilets obvious so out with the potty. While the wife is getting her dressed she's wondering what to do with it. Then quick as a flash a town dog comes up to the potty, picks up the number two, lifts his head and throws this big one down. Problem Solved :D:D

[VladTepes]

That's disgusting.

[RonMcGr]

Warning: This thread may be slightly off-putting to those who've just had, or are about to have dinner.

For everyone else - especially anyone who knows Mrs Vlad - you're going to love this story.

We went on a club day to Coochin Creek, and took our nephews, aged 4 and 8.

The 4 year old needed, at one stage, to go to the toilet for 'a poopie'.

Being the uncle, I took him across to what proved to be a drop toilet - the old -throw sawdust down the hole afterwards type.

Well, when Caleb saw this he suddenly didn't have the urge anymore. In his words "I don't need to... it's gone back inside now!" (I would have been rolling around on the floor with laughter had it not been for the surroundings!).

Later that day....

Caleb says the Mrs Vlad " I need to go to the toilet"

One of our fellow forum members adds "Looks like he already has" (or words to that effect,

Anyway it fell to Mrs Vlad to take the poor bugger back to the loos and do what (she tells me) was a horrible clean up.

By the clappers I was glad I flick-passed that one !


I envy all you people with kids NOT AT ALL !!!!


Cheers Vlad.

Yes, 25 years ago, the youngest (baby at the time) sh*t himself sitting in the baby seat in the back of our MB.
It twas the smell that alerted us to this fact.

I pull over to the side of the road, in country NSW.
Wife takes the baby out, I put a blanket on the flat boot lid, and she takes off the nappy.... Well, 5 billion flies appeared from nowhere and covered the kid and us. The kid was screaming and covered in flies, wife and I could hardly see with the flies in our eyes.. Flies from sh*t to us and return, I'm sure you get the picture :eek:

It was a totally unbelievable experience!

[dobbo]

The projectile vomit all over the interior of the car is a good trick, and a very good experience to remember. Or walking dog crap into the carpets on the car.

[George130]

The projectile vomit all over the interior of the car is a good trick, and a very good experience to remember. Or walking dog crap into the carpets on the car.

That's why all parents should have a Defender and a pressure washer.

[Blknight.aus]

yep, and an internal water tank with a compressor or pump so you can clean it up right then..... a 20l water jerry works pretty well in a pinch....

[Phred]

My 6 week old niece managed to vomit down plaster cast on broken right arm. The nurse who removed it really didn't enjoy the job. My son got menangitis when he was 13mths, absolute nightmare but every cloud has a silver lining, he managed to projectile vomit over his grandmother on the way to hospital and I wish I had a camera, some things need to be recorded for posterety.

[LandyAndy]

I never let my dog lick me.
He hovers over the cat waiting for it to do number 2s,wont even let the cat bury it,loves it warm.
If the cat gets lucky and gets to dump in peace and bury,Toby always tracks it down digs and it up.If only I could train the cat to eat Tobys doo doo,save cleaning up his mess.
Andrew

[B92 8NW]

It's Ok. They do grow out of it :D

Until their teens when they come home p1ssed. I've slept in the bath a few times - clothes and all - if I foresee its going to be an ethanol purging evening:D.

A vomited on bed is NEVER the same.

[BigJon]

All of these posts remind me of why I don't have any kids :p.

[Lotz-A-Landies]

NM !.........Let ya in on a little secret........That is why God invented Fire Hoses....:angel::)
Too right.

Years ago I commenced as a student nurse at Wolston Park Hospital and was working in one of the geratric wards. I arrived at work one afternoon and the Deputy Charge Nurse sent me into the showers to help out another in my group.

I arrived in the shower to view what could only be considered a "scene". Up against one wall with arms and legs stretched was this naked old man with a lower half just like I imagine Vlad's nephew Caleb, in the oposite corner was this male student nurse from my group with the fire hose directing the full flow at the old guy. Very sad image it was.

The male student turned around and saw me, handed me the fire hose and left. He was never seen again, didn't even come back to pick up his pay.

Diana