Visting relatives...

[El Duderino]

Alrighty! I'm exactly a week away from jumping on a plane to France and visiting my family. It's dad's side of the family, who tbh suck from past experiences, have never bothered to once call, send a chrissy or birthday card, etc. I'm the forgotten n ignored family member totally, n don't really include them in my definition of family. I'm only going over for dad's sakes, as it will be the last time that I will meet his parents, n I'm stressing pretty hard about the whole visit.

There's a couple of cousins who are also excluded n we've kept in contact, and are meeting up for chrissy and some riotous times, but asides from that I'm dreading meeting the 'rest'. I have no time for them, **** all in common, n they've been leaning financially on dad for years, which has diminished my opinion of them even further, to the status of leeches. My dad/stepmum and my mum's money is good enough for them, but being family to us seems too hard for them...he's continuously bailed out 5 of his 7 siblings and that grinds my gears. WTF?!?!

Thankfully, after a heated discussion with the old man, I'm only required to attend a few family functions, but I feel very uneasy about even doing this tbh. Has anybody else been in similar positions, and can someone give me advice how to survive the whole BS scenarios of 'family and friendliness' when you despise their guts beyond comprehension, but do so for the sake of keeping the old man happy?

There are weeks of my trip away catching up with mates n extended family from the UK on mum's side who I like, but the rest of the trip is looking like it's going to suck at this stage.... PLEASE help!!!

[alien]

You can pick your freinds but not your relatives;)
Just been told leeches coming to my place so can't make an exuse to leave:mad:
Um..Happy holiday:twisted: :wasntme:
Safe trip mate.

[dobbo]

You could just tell it like it is, or sit and smile for the sake of you father.

[Slunnie]

Sometimes you need to dig deep and gain some greater perspective on life. Step up, be the man, look them in the eye and shake their hand and look for the things that can be gained from the get together, even if whats gained isn't for you. Anybody can be selfish, but your Dad sounds like he is the epitome of someone that puts others before himself - you should do that for him.

[d@rk51d3]

Find a few you can tolerate, and just stick with them. It's what I do............ that, and take long walks in the night.

[El Duderino]

Sometimes you need to dig deep and gain some greater perspective on life. Step up, be the man, look them in the eye and shake their hand and look for the things that can be gained from the get together, even if whats gained isn't for you. Anybody can be selfish, but your Dad sounds like he is the epitome of someone that puts others before himself - you should do that for him.

Thanks for the insight mate. Tbh, dad n I haven't been that close for a long time because he's had his priorities screwed up for a very long time... Long story short, but I'm an only child, mum battled to put me through a private school n I had to work two jobs since I was 14 to afford to do anything...at stages I was even paying half my tuition. Dad 'ain't all that n a bag of potato chips', but have been trying to mend bridges for a long time. Meanwhile these rellies were having their debts wiped, houses paid off, etc. You can understand why I have some animosity towards them yeah?

I want to do the right thing, but have so much I'd love to say...

[Slunnie]

Thanks for the insight mate. Tbh, dad n I haven't been that close for a long time because he's had his priorities screwed up for a very long time... Long story short, but I'm an only child, mum battled to put me through a private school n I had to work two jobs since I was 14 to afford to do anything...at stages I was even paying half my tuition. Dad 'ain't all that n a bag of potato chips', but have been trying to mend bridges for a long time. Meanwhile these rellies were having their debts wiped, houses paid off, etc. You can understand why I have some animosity towards them yeah?

I want to do the right thing, but have so much I'd love to say...
Dude, I bet there is one hell of lot you'd want to say to them. I would also bet that you have grown and developed in resilience, toughness and in strength of character. How you deal with any given situation is an indicator of your manliness, and although there can be all the advice in the world, only you can decide what is right for you.

[rovercare]

I'm going bush for xmas, yay:D......It'll be a family affair, my dog and brother are going:)

[Slunnie]

I'm going bush for xmas, yay:D......It'll be a family affair, my dog and brother are going:)
I'm off to Sydney to catch up with the oldies... then I got told all of the country relo's are coming for another bash at my place just after! :eek: :lol2:

[Disco_owner]

Sometimes you need to dig deep and gain some greater perspective on life. Step up, be the man, look them in the eye and shake their hand and look for the things that can be gained from the get together, even if whats gained isn't for you. Anybody can be selfish, but your Dad sounds like he is the epitome of someone that puts others before himself - you should do that for him.

:eek: Wow Slunnie , I think we can ALL Learn from this Post . Very Well Said.

[El Duderino]

Dude, I bet there is one hell of lot you'd want to say to them. I would also bet that you have grown and developed in resilience, toughness and in strength of character. How you deal with any given situation is an indicator of your manliness, and although there can be all the advice in the world, only you can decide what is right for you.

Yeah I've grown resiliant n made my own path, and feel proud of what I achieved thus far. I'm a strong character and will keep my trap shut n be polite, but that doesn't make the exchanges any easier if you know what I mean.

My grandparents on mums side taught me all I need, as they were my 'real' family. I'm the better man n know it, so my impression will reflect that. It doesn't really build bridges, but will indicate how I was brought up by mum (who did all the hard work).

I'd seriously love to dish a massive spray to the lot of them (which they all deserve), but I know I'm better than that, and can show the lot of these bastards that I've done what they couldn't... ;)

[Shonky]

Good luck mate!

I posted a bit about my idiot relatives previously, and this year for family christmas in Sydney I have declined. To my pretentious church going North Shore relatives this is blasphemy! I love it! :twisted:

I convinced mum and sis to bail as well (I am pretty sure we have been excommunicated now - no loss) and now we are having our own christmas at the farm. Just us, the dogs, the neighbours who drop in and no dickhead towny relos!

Any family that charges each other for christmas lunch is not worth hanging out with I reckon.

(week before christmas: "everyone bring a plate - we'll bring the prawns".
Christmas Day: "everyone needs to chip in some money for us because WE bought the prawns"
Ummm... :eek:)