Thread: The best insults...

They said you weren't worth ****ing on but I stood up for you. I told them you were.

I'd love to insult you, but you wouldn't understand.

If ignorance were bliss, you'd be the happiest person alive.

I’d love to chat with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV.

I don’t know what makes you dumb, but it really works.

I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it. (Groucho Marx)

so let me guess....you drive a Landcruiser.....

your father should have pulled out and shot you up the curtain.....

A head like yours should ache......





I worked with a guy who repeatedly told anyone who would listen how cold the water was on his 'head' whenever he used the loo....

I said, I prefer the spring water out the front, but if you like the taste...

I think it was Sir Winston Churchill who, during ww2 staggered out of a pub, when a lady said, "Mr Churchill, you're drunk!" To which he replied, "yes my dear, and you are ugly, but in the morning I will be sober".

If you where twice as smart as you are now you would still be half as smart as any one else.
Mum told me never argue with a idiot. You will just drag me down to your level and beat me with experience.
So Darwin was right about evolution.
Cheers Hall

Yes, he's the original 'self-made man', - a classic result of unskilled labour.

Originally Posted by Will Wallace

I think it was Sir Winston Churchill who, during ww2 staggered out of a pub, when a lady said, "Mr Churchill, you're drunk!" To which he replied, "yes my dear, and you are ugly, but in the morning I will be sober".

I'd always heard it as ..... "Madam, in the morning I'll be sober but you will remain ugly"

When I want you to speak I'll pull your chain.