DISCIPLINE THESE DAYS

In my irrelevant opinion I don't see smacking as having an impact on behavioural change. IMHO yes there defiantly needs to be discipline and punishments but doesn't necessarily need to be physical (I'm not against smacking but just don't see it as what's really missing) I do a little teaching with high school kids form time to time and one thing I have learnt is that they pick up very quickly on empty threats ie if you say something you have to back it up eg parents at the supermarket saying if you do that one more time 10 times in a row. It takes discipline on the parents behalf to provide discipline to the child ie if you say your not going to the beach now because of ..... you have to suck it up and follow through.
Parents don't seem to follow up as they are too concerned with being the kids friend not a parent that provides needed discipline. So the lack of smacking would be a side effect from this area.
Society as a while has too much emphasis on rights and none on responsibilities which in turn breeds narcissists . Not just in younger generations but a cross the board, yes plenty of grey nomads fit that bill too(good and bad in all generations).

this is bull****.....I got a pretty good hiding from my father at times for irellavant things that ****ed him off.....all he did was really **** me off....I didn't even go to his funeral.

as for teachers , many of them caned me and it only created hate towards teachers, none of it changed my behavoiur or made me a better person . probably only got their rocks off hitting little kids.

btw , had no problem with female teachers nor got "punished" by them.

Spot on Squizzy, too many politically correct procedures in place for most people to to take action too,, in public anyway. No point locking kids I their rooms, they'll just play on their phones or game machines. No lesson learnt.
Everything has a pecking order, and the human races is fast disappearing.

"Stop that snacking immediately.... it leads to fat bastards everywhere. :D
I think most kids get their shocking behaviour from the examples they're shown by parents and other kids who don't get any punishment.
We've got an 8 year old rellie who is an absolute shocker at school and at home or at rellies places. Teachers no longer attempt to control him.
Then we look at his dad..... cops regularly turf him out of the house with a "24hr Do Not Return" ticket. Gets drunk, uses drugs, uncontrollable temper, sometimes works but his attitude eventually stops that, wastes any money he can get his hands on.
Has had taxpayer funded counselling for all of it and still offends. Any wonder the kid is a little turd?
AlanH.

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Originally Posted by ramblingboy42

as for teachers , many of them caned me and it only created hate towards teachers, none of it changed my behavoiur or made me a better person . probably only got their rocks off hitting little kids.

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Yep discipline without the respect or understanding can sometimes be the easy way out for us guys as it comes too naturally. If your training a horse would you get sufficient outcomes by punching it in the head but by no means great, on the opposite side of the same coin you could give it all the love and nurturing you like but that won't train it either. Like most things it needs a balanced approach= not just discipline alone (ruling with an iron fist)and not just nurturing alone ("Mummy would prefer you didn't stab her with scissors sweetie, I know your just expressing your feelings but it is interrupting my Facebook time dear")

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Originally Posted by squizzyhunter

If your training a horse would you get sufficient outcomes by punching it in the head but by no means great, on the opposite side of the same coin you could give it all the love and nurturing you like but that won't train it either.

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They run faster when you whack them with a stick, though.

Never make a threat unless you're prepared to do it. Kids aren't stupid. Violence is only a way of getting their attention - there are better ways. Actions have consequences - make the consequences real and predictible. Set boundaries, give reasons, and keep your words. If your kid behaves like a brat, remember that behaviour has been learned, so look in the mirror.

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When my kids were young I would smack them. However I did not have to do this very often as the threat of a smack was enough.

They both knew that the threat of a smack was real. Too many parents threaten the smack but never actually do it. And as has been pointed out, they soon cotton on to that.

Both my children, now aged 25 and 23 have both turned into fine well behaved and well mannered young adults.

We were strict but fair in their upbringing and a few years ago they thanked us for this, as they can now see how it has benefited them.

When I was young, mum used to use the strap when we were naughty and for serious naughtyness dad would use the cane. I think I only ever had the cane once.

This punishment never did me any harm. The old saying "spare the rod spoil the child" to me is spot on.

Ramblingboy. Your case sounds to me more like child abuse, not just punishment for being a naughty boy.

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Originally Posted by squizzyhunter

Yep discipline without the respect or understanding can sometimes be the easy way out for us guys as it comes too naturally. If your training a horse would you get sufficient outcomes by punching it in the head but by no means great, on the opposite side of the same coin you could give it all the love and nurturing you like but that won't train it either. Like most things it needs a balanced approach= not just discipline alone (ruling with an iron fist)and not just nurturing alone ("Mummy would prefer you didn't stab her with scissors sweetie, I know your just expressing your feelings but it is interrupting my Facebook time dear")

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what a load of ****ing ****.

my daughter trains horses with zero discipline.

I have raised 3 children with zero discipline.

I have trained 3 dogs with zero discipline.

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Originally Posted by ramblingboy42

what a load of ****ing ****.

my daughter trains horses with zero discipline.

I have raised 3 children with zero discipline.

I have trained 3 dogs with zero discipline.

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Discipline takes many forms , i highly doubt you let your kids run riot and do what ever they liked ?