Have I done the right thing?

You’ve done the right thing.
I encourage anyone to to do the same.
My friend has early onset dementia, he is is a pilot.
He failed a couple of checks and lost his job.
We thought he was having some sort of breakdown but didn’t know what was really going on.
A few months passed and some odd behavior when the diagnosis came in and the family were at a loss as to how to deal with the disease and cope themselves.
They desperately wanted life to be as normal as possible in a rapidly deteriorating situation.
He could perform many tasks as good as ever, like driving and flying (motor program type tasks) but cognition was evaporating fast.

This was the hard part deciding what he could do vs should do.
He was able to pass his pilot medical in the early stages which ridiculously meant he could fly privately and continued driving also.
There was never any question in the families mind that they would allow him near a plane, however,
we had to speak up/ intervene when we realised the family were not able to objectively assess the consequences of denying/removing this freedom.

It’s not easy it’s not often appreciated but it is right, it is just, it is necessary, it is pro active compassion for everyone.
You/we will never know whoever else was spared the trauma and agony of injury for stepping up, but certainly the family won’t go through the guilt or responsibility for someone else’s injury or death.

It's awful, but my dad started doing **** like this and he had been a brilliant driver.

We took the car keys off him and i commandeered the car.
He never forgave me, he'd lost his freedom but my sister and I weren't going to have someones injury or death on our conscious.

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Originally Posted by strangy

You’ve done the right thing.
I encourage anyone to to do the same.
My friend has early onset dementia, he is is a pilot.
He failed a couple of checks and lost his job.
We thought he was having some sort of breakdown but didn’t know what was really going on.
A few months passed and some odd behavior when the diagnosis came in and the family were at a loss as to how to deal with the disease and cope themselves.
They desperately wanted life to be as normal as possible in a rapidly deteriorating situation.
He could perform many tasks as good as ever, like driving and flying (motor program type tasks) but cognition was evaporating fast.

This was the hard part deciding what he could do vs should do.
He was able to pass his pilot medical in the early stages which ridiculously meant he could fly privately and continued driving also.
There was never any question in the families mind that they would allow him near a plane, however,
we had to speak up/ intervene when we realised the family were not able to objectively assess the consequences of denying/removing this freedom.

It’s not easy it’s not often appreciated but it is right, it is just, it is necessary, it is pro active compassion for everyone.
You/we will never know whoever else was spared the trauma and agony of injury for stepping up, but certainly the family won’t go through the guilt or responsibility for someone else’s injury or death.

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It's bloody hard Mark.

I should've intervened with dad earlier, but when he was hallucinating while driving and dodging "evil angels" that are trying to get him something had to be done.
It was made easier as he'd been admitted to hospital for assessment and to fine tune his Parkinson's meds because of the hallucinations.
After two weeks they wouldn't releases him unless he went into some sort of care, but even then between the psych and doctors they didn't take his license!!??

Police will charge him, Transport department will ask him to show cause as to why he shouldn't have the licence taken off him. You have 100% (no shadow of a doubt) done the right thing reporting him. Good thing you did.
The fact that he couldn't comprehend in the driver's seat that he was on the wrong side of the road, or after the accident, and it took him time to comprehend it when you told him all point to this conclusion. He could easily have killed someone due to his condition. His daughter is culpable in trying to get you to not report it.

Tell them, don't be a killer, use taxis or Uber. My Ma had a pensioner's taxi concession and used it every week.

You did the right thing latter or not [wink11]
Id like to think things change for the better in the future as far as doctors are concerned re mandatory reporting as all this falls back on them for their lack of action in reporting in the first place once diagnosed or suspected.

And yes family and or neighbours are also responsible and all should be made accountable as they are more guilty than the party for allowing it to continue .

My cousin in Sydney was hit head-on while in his Police car by an elderly woman around 20 years ago. He suffers from this accident to this day and ended up being invalided out of the Force in his early 30's, thus having his career cut short. You definitely did the right thing. Unfortunately in life, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.

Definitely did the right thing. You may have saved his life and other lives.
I had to intervene to get his doctor to report that my father was unfit to drive. My MIL has had to be prevented from driving because of her Parkinson's.
Sometimes people are incapable of realistically judging their own fitness to drive.
Also, accidents must always be reported to police so an incident number is created for insurance purposes.

I think you did the right thing, despite the fact that I could well be in this position in the next ten years - which would probably effectively end my life.

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Originally Posted by JDNSW

I think you did the right thing, despite the fact that I could well be in this position in the next ten years - which would probably effectively end my life.

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John im sorry to hear that. And whereas i believe you are probably in the minority that will recognise this looming issue and do something about it, i do understand that many will have huge ramifications by losing their indeoendence.
I can't apologise for my comments earlier but i do wish you all the best and if i were living up your way i would be happy to drive you anywhere at anytime 😊.

Jc