I just went outside and my ****ing Defender was gone.

[Shonky]

Went out to go to the letterbox and the space where I parked the Deefer this afternoon was empty!

I got wobbly at the knees, had a mild heart attack and stood on my porch in shock for a moment...






...until out of the corner of my eye, I saw something move behind the trees on the neighbours verge.

I rubbed my eyes and looked closely.

It moved again.

It was big.

It was white.

It was shaped suspiciously like a Defender.



I took off across the front lawn towards our slopey street - as I jumped off the gutter and took off down the road I could see my pride and joy hugging the gutter, slowly lurching foward - a few millimeters at a time. It dawned on me what had happened...

When I parked this arvo, I must have forgotten to put the handbrake on. I always park on the street pointing downhill, and I usually start off in second gear. Which is evidently what I had parked it in.

As I was watching TV and eating dinner, gravity and compression were fighting an epic battle not 10 meters away. Evidently unable to overpower each other, the two forces had fallen into an alternating rythm... With each stroke, the bloody thing had crept a little further down the street!

It just so happened that at that point I recieved an SMS from a fellow AULRO member, asking if they could pick up an item they had loaned me. "No worries" says I. "I'll leave it in the letterbox!"


So here I am, running down the road in my boxer shorts, a bag cotaining Mark's throttle linkages in one hand, keys in the other, chasing a Defender that has taken itself for a walk and was now, inch by inch, closing the last few metres to my neighbours new Mazda 6.

Ever tried finding the door key for a Deefer, on a keyring full of keys, in the dark, in your underpants, as your 1 week old car moves in slow motion to mate with a Mazda?



I found it eventually... 2 metres and closing... and threw myself headlong into the footwell and ramming every available body part onto the brake.

Crisis averted.





Yes, I put the handbrake on. Yes, it is in gear. Yes, there is now a brick under every wheel.

Excuse me now while I change my dacks.

[jerryd]

You were lucky, it's a good idea to point your front wheels into the kerb when parking on a slope

[MickS]

Well done.

My '69 Valiant did that, except it was parked at the top of my driveway and rolled down. Fortunately when I had parked it, the front wheels were turned to the right, so it missed the house. However, it took out a garden, colourbond fence, children's play swing set (which was childless at the time) before it came to rest with a liquid amber branch through the radiator. Happy to report, other than the radiator, no other damage to the Val ...

[LandyAndy]

Mate,I just had a good laugh reading the post.
If both the handbrake and it was in gear,it would seem there is serious issues with both the motor AND transmission.
MAYBE it was in neutral and no handbrake
Andrew

[Hall]

First up. Grouse all ended well. That A the Defender was not stolen and B there won`t be any cross breeding with Mazda`s. Can`t have any diluting of the rover gene pool. Reads like a script from a AMMI ad You`l have to park it reverse gear,that will stop it`s mating habits or get it `fixed'
Cheers Hall

[isuzutoo-eh]

Crap! Averted an epic tragedy there!

[abaddonxi]

Well that'll teach you to leave locked.

Glad there wasn't more damage.

[REL]

Whilst no doubt, not funny at the time, but...........................

We had a similar incident, but with my fathers ford. We live on 32 acres, I get a phone call at work that someone has stolen my fathers car, and rolled it down the hill on our property, where it was now firmly wedge between a couple of saplings in the winter creek Kids and Dad are too scared to go down to the car, in case the perpetrator is still in car. So I make the long trip home (its amazing how many things go through the brain on a 45min rush trip home ) and venture down fully thinking I'll get down to said car and pulled the bastard out. Low and behold car was empty and hand brake was off. Now I'm upset that I didn't get to see the car go down the hill - it would have been airborne at some stage

So if Defer had meet Mazda, does that mean you would have had a Mafer or would it be a Defda???

[big guy]

Bloody funny.

I had a mental picture of it and now can't shake it.

Must have been the boxers.
Glad its all good.

[isuzutoo-eh]

I'd say you should park something sacrificial like a red rangie in the way next time...buuut....i'm about to go outside and brick its' wheels now