The Ramblings of a middle aged man.

[landy]

Hi all,
Im not asking for, or offering anything. I just wanted to put pen to paper so to speak.
I've been away recently, for two months. We worked 14 hour days, 7 days a week. And at 47 i'm not sure I want to do it anymore.
I received some bad news while I was away. A man I respected greatly died in his sleep. He was 43 years old and extremely fit. He had a heart scare a week earlier and was passed fit and sent home. His poor wife woke to a dead husband 2 days later. It shook me up and its very sad. The poor girl never got to say her goodbyes. I'm still deeply in love with Kerry, I tell her I love her often. I'm now glad I do.
Ive had a **** 2 weeks at work since getting back. In 14 years of doing this job I want to chuck in the towel. But like a lot of men my age what else can I do that pays the bills?
I have had a very lucky 18 months though. So I cant really complain. We sold our old camper trailer recently and purchased a Howling moon roof top tent and tried it this weekend for the first time. Im really impressed. We went to Kenilworth this weekend. Just to try it out and test a few things. As I was sitting their last night, talking to Kerry and sipping on a lazy scotch and dry I commented that i'm happiest when we get away, in fact its blissful. Even if it's only over night. Nothing makes me as happy as when we take the Rover, hitch up the camper and get away. And it puts thing into perspective, I work to do the stuff I want to do when I'm not working.
So, whats my point. Nothing really, just the ramblings of a middle age man.
But......If I could say only one thing. Enjoy what you have. Don't sweat the small stuff and most importantly, Love and adore your partner and tell them often. You may not get the chance tomorrow.

I wish you all good health and happiness.
Take care.

Cheers

Nino.


P.S. We're off to Kenilworth again next weekend. Theres plenty of room left. If anyone wants to join us to just relax, fish/swim/kayak or just talk LandRovers please feel free to come along.

[WhiteD3]

Mate,

You're not rambling at all! You're 47, got mates dying on you and adjusting to this new stage of life. Coming out the other side of this age conversion/realignment/crisis that blokes seem to go through, I can say with authority that TIME is the key.

It takes time to get your head around people not being around anymore. People die, as will you, for all sorts of reasons, with timing good and bad and with gaps big and small left in their wake.

It takes time to adjust to the change in your priorities with, interest in and enjoyment of work. As you say though, bills still have to be paid. This is the curse of being a bloke...the bread winner.

Make sure you talk things through with someone you trust. Death, work and future are big issues and not solved overnight.

[TeamFA]

Whereabouts in Kenilworth do you camp?\

We're planning on going camping next weekend, but haven't decided on a destination. Has to be somewhere where the canines came come as well.

[bob10]

I'm still deeply in love with Kerry, I tell her I love her often.

As I was sitting their last night, talking to Kerry and sipping on a lazy scotch and dry I commented that i'm happiest when we get away, in fact its blissful. Even if it's only over night. Nothing makes me as happy as when we take the Rover, hitch up the camper and get away. And it puts thing into perspective, I work to do the stuff I want to do when I'm not working.

Enjoy what you have. Don't sweat the small stuff and most importantly, Love and adore your partner and tell them often. You may not get the chance tomorrow.

I wish you all good health and happiness.
Take care.

Very wise words, thank you. You sound like you've got it sorted, mate, all the best for the future . Bob

[Barefoot Dave]

G'Day Nino.
You seem like you are ready for a change and are really focussed on what matters. This is a troubling time in our lives, but is also full of opportunities for change.
If you hate work so much, start making your exit plan.
Ask yourself "What do I really love doing?" or at least "What pays fairly well and I could tolerate doing?"
work:life. Grit your teeth doing something you don't like and ditch early every Friday, jump into the packed LR, grab your bride and head for the hills. Pay yourself for your hard work and worry by using it to do the things you love.

If it is becoming too much, start planning to leave. If you like travelling, do a short course on travel writing. Start a blog or submit stories to 4wd/ travel/ etc etc mags
If you are great at your job (that you hate), write a 'How to' book. Make it an E Book like my buyers guide and you don't have to stuff around with printers, stock or postage
Take care

[landy]

Whereabouts in Kenilworth do you camp?\

We're planning on going camping next weekend, but haven't decided on a destination. Has to be somewhere where the canines came come as well.

We are staying at the kenilworth homestead. It's a great place and let's you take dogs. There is a river frontage that's a great place to swim with kids. We've always enjoyed our time there.
Happy to share a spot and just relax around a fire and talk crap with fellow landrover nuts.

All most welcome.

Cheers
Nino.

[TeamFA]

We are staying at the kenilworth homestead. It's a great place and let's you take dogs. There is a river frontage that's a great place to swim with kids. We've always enjoyed our time there.
Happy to share a spot and just relax around a fire and talk crap with fellow landrover nuts.

All most welcome.

Cheers
Nino.

The social organiser is on to them presently... we were aiming at Sandy Creek, but they are fully booked.

Kenilworth Homestead is on our list of places to check out. It will be interesting to see if they have room on a long weekend in the school holidays...

Thanks!

[Chucaro]

During our 2 years touring and living in our motorhome we have the chance to know about a dozen of couples in the early fifties doind the same as us but with one difference, one in each couple was terminally ill.
All of them were working full time with the weekends doing the house duties and just expending money in things that are not important before they got the bad news.
It is extremely sad to see people in that situation and a good lesson for all of us to appreciate what we got and what it is and what it is not important.

Pepe Mujca is spot on when he said, quote:

"We have sacrificed the old immaterial gods, and now we are occupying the temple of the Market-God. He organizes our economy, our politics, our habits, our lives, and even provides us with rates and credit cards and gives us the appearance of happiness.

"It seems that we have been born only to consume and to consume, and when we can no longer consume, we have a feeling of frustration, and we suffer from poverty, and we are auto-marginalized."

[wardy1]

What a wonderful start to this thread. Landy you summed up how we should prioritise our lives beautifully I think.

I'm 58 and as many know, split up with my wife of almost 30 years about 21/2 years ago. Funnily enough, we get on better now than we have in a long time. In fact, she's occupying the passenger seat on boxing day on a trip to Brisbane via the Warrumbungles which she never saw when we were together. Of course we still have our differences, but we are still important to each other. IMHO life is way too short to carry grudges or to carry anger forward in our lives.

I too have lost a friend or two over the last couple of years. None of them actually went off and did the things some of the people Chucaro met travelling have done. I congratulate those people unreservedly.

Live life to the full, hug those you love often and be good to others, you will then have few, if any regrets when your own time comes.

[Chenz]

I hear you landy. I have had the same thoughts recently. You are here for a good time not a long time. We are reaching that time in our lives when we start to feel just that little bit more vulnerable.

Having watched my mother die of an aggressive bowel cancer I was none to pleased to be told that recent bouts of diverticulitis would mean my bowel needed resection (cut out the bad bit and join it back up again) and they would not know the reason until they did a biopsy.

Luckily they found no cancer but it gets you thinking - do I need to work a full time job anymore? Luckily we paid off our mortgage this year and I have taken a much less stressful job.

Having recently done another EDJIT Adventure with my wife and the usual crew you realise there is more to life than 9-5. I will looking seriously at a transition to retirement and get out and about with Er Indoors,the 130 and the Trayon a bit more often.

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