Thread: Embarrassment

Banjo, how are you going mate, not good by the sounds of it. Mate, I have looked at this Thread every other day to see how you are going. One thing that seems to escape you is that EVERY body who has posted on this Thread genuinely cares about you. Suggestions have been made and rebuffed at every turn, it puts us ( your friends) into a corner. I for one have nothing else to offer except friendship and good wishes.
You mentioned a couple of posts back about giving money back that was raised by your good friends to help out your family. Note, I said your family and not necessarily you. To raise that money took a great deal of organising and time spent on the project, it didn't just happen.

You are now saying that you wish to give the money back, which means in a way you are ****ting on your friends, just because you do not agree with comments made on this Thread.

You say you don't have any friends, I for one am desperately trying to be your friend but I don't like being **** on. Banjo, I don't really know which way to turn now, but I will stay in the background again and I am ALWAYS ready to help in any way possible!!!
Cheers mate and good luck again!!!!

Originally Posted by DiscoMick

Please stay online Jason.

Yeah!

We want Jason!
We want Jason!
We want Jason!
We want Jason!
We want Jason!
We want Jason!
We want Jason!
We want Jason!

Pretty much spot on Jim, I will not sever the friendship, and will offer any support I can, BUT..........you keep inventing excuses for not doing the only thing that may save you.

Regarding the money, what can Jim do with it? He has no idea from where it came, (nor does anyone else) Jim was only the messenger. It was deliberately set up that way, so no one knew who or how much was given.

use are pushing me backwards at the moment it feels like its my oldman all over again..
I have lost everything that meens anything to me ..

I found out today that Micayla is **** scared of me & my temper .yes i have a temper & i throw or kick screem & sware my hissy fit & then its over .I HAVE NEVER HIT ANY OF THEM NOR WOULD I ...I also found out today a couple of weeks ago we where fighting & fred Gave Karen a cuddle & i said hey i never get any of them not meening anything. so fred went to bed & i went for a shower & she snuk out & gave Karen another cuddle & said mum your doing the right thing he was going to hit you then..

So i feel **** knowing that...

Im 39 years old & all i want from life is Karen & the kids nothing else..
I would rather die..

I hate it here & hate being here . i talk to myself lots..

Its killing me so bad being away from Karen & the kids..

I dont know what to do. if i could do what use ask or say i woild be visiting the kids everyday...

Originally Posted by banjo;1345577[B

]use are pushing me backwards at the moment[/B] it feels like its my oldman all over again..
I have lost everything that meens anything to me ..

I found out today that Micayla is **** scared of me & my temper .yes i have a temper & i throw or kick screem & sware my hissy fit & then its over .I HAVE NEVER HIT ANY OF THEM NOR WOULD I ...I also found out today a couple of weeks ago we where fighting & fred Gave Karen a cuddle & i said hey i never get any of them not meening anything. so fred went to bed & i went for a shower & she snuk out & gave Karen another cuddle & said mum your doing the right thing he was going to hit you then..

So i feel **** knowing that...

Im 39 years old & all i want from life is Karen & the kids nothing else..
I would rather die..

I hate it here & hate being here . i talk to myself lots..

Its killing me so bad being away from Karen & the kids..

I dont know what to do. if i could do what use ask or say i woild be visiting the kids everyday...

No we are not, you said that we didn't, we are trying to get you to move forward!!! Don't blame your father, don't blame us ( your good friends), blame yourself. Look in a mirror mate and say to yourself, "I am reponsible for me, nobody else, just me"!!!

While I'm at it Banjo!! I'll tell you what I have a step son thats a druggy, we help the Grandmother on the other side raise his kids, my wife's father is in hospital at the moment, not expected to live ( he is 90) and we are going to the hospital daily ( Mrs Aus is, I'm getting there between jobs) and I am spending time here trying to help you, am I wasting my time or what!!! You are saying "poor me, I miss and need Karen so much", listen buddy DO SOMETHING TO PROVE TO KAREN THAT YOU HAVE CHANGED and that means help and advice from professional people. You seem to be only looking at this Forum for help and there is one thing you have to grasp, this is a Forum for LandRover enthusiasts we can only suggest, which we have done and you throw up a roadblock at every suggestion made, I throw up my arms in dispair.
Mate, I ask you again ( for the umpteenth time) seek professional advice, you need this and you need a change of mind set, its like a druggy or a smoker or an alcoholic coming down from their addiction, YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE, YOU NEED PROFESSIONAL ASSISTANCE to guide you through the difficult times ahead.
As I see it you are just going to wallow there in self pity......PROVE ME WRONG!!!

Originally Posted by Ausfree

While I'm at it Banjo!! I'll tell you what I have a step son thats a druggy, we help the Grandmother on the other side raise his kids, my wife's father is in hospital at the moment, not expected to live ( he is 90) and we are going to the hospital daily ( Mrs Aus is, I'm getting there between jobs) and I am spending time here trying to help you, am I wasting my time or what!!! You are saying "poor me, I miss and need Karen so much", listen buddy DO SOMETHING TO PROVE TO KAREN THAT YOU HAVE CHANGED and that means help and advice from professional people. You seem to be only looking at this Forum for help and there is one thing you have to grasp, this is a Forum for LandRover enthusiasts we can only suggest, which we have done and you throw up a roadblock at every suggestion made, I throw up my arms in dispair.
Mate, I ask you again ( for the umpteenth time) seek professional advice, you need this and you need a change of mind set, its like a druggy or a smoker or an alcoholic coming down from their addiction, YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE, YOU NEED PROFESSIONAL ASSISTANCE to guide you through the difficult times ahead.
As I see it you are just going to wallow there in self pity......PROVE ME WRONG!!!

Hmmm now what shall i do should i just drive down to my docs & back after the appointment & then make an appointment for the shrink then drive down there & back again after it..SO EASY ISNT IT...now if i could just up & do that trust me i would be visiting my bloody kids everyday...
yes i could ring someone but again they will just tell me to seak help off shrink so that would make it so much easier to do because i rang someone so they could tell me the same thing use all do...

Now if it was that easy for me i wouldn';t be where i am right now..

So tell me why its going to be easier for me to get there from here when i have trouble getting there from home which is only 2 minutes away from the docs..

I was doing all i could back home & was able to do a few things on my own like visit aus at home & at kotara..& i felt i was doing it for Karen & the kids like i said i was looking forward to achieving taking Cody to footy training on my own so he mite be happy & posably proud of me..

Up here i am having trouble just fending for myself getting food & the like, so how the hell can i just jump & go back down there to see the doc...



Yes i want to get help but its extremely hard from here maybe after i can fend for myself i maybe able to somehow do this..
At home it was easier as i was doing it for Karen & the kids i would still be doing this from here but it mite be better if i could actualy fend for myself first...

Use dont seem to understand that a panic attack is so debilitating that if i did all this to the docs & had a panic attack would set me back sofar i wouldn't be able to do a thing...

So what you are saying is that when you lived at home you couldn't do it for 23 years, so now you are living at Maitland there is an extra reason why you can't do it?????????????????? Sounds like a nice comfy extra barrier to me, Banjo!!!! Look we do understand a
panic attack is very debilitating, so are other conditions like cancer, alcoholism, addiction to drugs, smoking,heart conditions, I can go on and on, but the central issue remains, you decide to tackle the problem or not!!!