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Thread: British military OFR'S [ officer fitness reports]

  1. 15th April 2012, 05:40 PM #1
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    British military OFR'S [ officer fitness reports]

    Mate of mine sent me some actual OFR'S for the RN., and Royal Marines, they show a well refined sense of humour. :

    - His men would follow him, but only out of curiosity
    - I would not breed from this Officer.
    - He would be out of his depth in a car park puddle
    - Technically sound, but socially impossible
    - She sets low personal standards and then constantly fails to achieve them
    - He has the wisdom of youth, and energy of old age.
    - The only ship I would recommend this man for is citizenship
    - This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot
    - Only occasionally wets himself under pressure
    - This Officer should go far, the sooner the better
    - In my opinion, this pilot should not be authorised to fly below 250 ft.
    - Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom, and started to dig
    - He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire satisfaction
    They must have had a lot of time on their hands, Bob

    -
    Last edited by bob10; 16th April 2012 at 10:45 AM. Reason: @ instead of and
    I’m pretty sure the dinosaurs died out when they stopped gathering food and started having meetings to discuss gathering food

    A bookshop is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking
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  2. 15th April 2012, 06:22 PM #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by bob10 View Post
    Mate of mine sent me some actual OFR'S for the RN., @ Royal Marines, they show a well refined sense of humour. :
    ...
    ...
    - Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom, @ started to dig
    - He has carried out each @ every one of his duties to his entire satisfaction
    They must have had a lot of time on their hands, Bob -
    Bob, did they actually use the "@" (at) symbol instead of the "&" (and) symbol?

    I knew English grammar standards had dropped, but thought the Royal Navy wouldn't have been the place to do it!

    Diana

    You won't find me on: faceplant; Scipe; Infragam; LumpedIn; ShapCnat or Twitting. I'm just not that interesting.
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  3. 15th April 2012, 06:28 PM #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lotz-A-Landies View Post
    Bob, did they actually use the "@" (at) symbol instead of the "&" (and) symbol?

    I knew English grammar standards had dropped, but thought the Royal Navy wouldn't have been the place to do it!

    Diana
    You got me Diana, but the Royal marines have always been trying to get at the Matelots, very suss, those sea soldiers. Bob
    I’m pretty sure the dinosaurs died out when they stopped gathering food and started having meetings to discuss gathering food

    A bookshop is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking
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  4. 15th April 2012, 06:31 PM #4
    superquag
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    More than one standard for grammar?

    Royal Navy a place at which to lower said standards?



    - Waiting on the other pedants !

    Pedant | Define Pedant at Dictionary.com
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  5. 15th April 2012, 07:05 PM #5
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    Who was that Muphry again?

    [ame="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muphry%27s_law"]Muphry's law - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia[/ame]

    You won't find me on: faceplant; Scipe; Infragam; LumpedIn; ShapCnat or Twitting. I'm just not that interesting.
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  6. 15th April 2012, 10:58 PM #6
    Davo
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    Muhpry's brother.
    At any given point in time, somewhere in the world someone is working on a Land-Rover.
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  7. 16th April 2012, 09:25 AM #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lotz-A-Landies View Post
    Bob, did they actually use the "@" (at) symbol instead of the "&" (and) symbol?
    I used to see that occur many times when I was the LROC News editor. Always on articles (from Mac users) when imported into the Windows software I was using, That wasn't the only incorrectly imported symbol.
    Ron B.
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  8. 16th April 2012, 08:00 PM #8
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    Has all the cans for a 6 pack but lacks the plastic bit to hold it all together

    Works well when cornered like a rat and is unable to weasle out of the job.

    assigning respnsibilty to this officer is like going to MCdonalds for a salad.

    Member can often be found asleep on shift, work proceeds better at these times

    Members attention span and work quality is inversly proportional to the signal strength on her mobile phone

    His team mates will follow him into battle, but only because it gives them someone to hide behind.

    Is the person I would want to be with in a life and death situation as he always finds the easy way out.

    Is perpetually bemused by the fact that when his subordinates do anything other than as he instructs the job goes well.

    do I really have to fill this bit out?

    I can not in good faith write anything in this section as I am not in the habit of putting lies to paper and telling the truth could leave me facing discrimination charges.

    I would only recommend this person for promotion in the hope that she would wind up with subordinates of her own caliber so she might learn from her own short comings.
    Dave

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