Marriage course

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Originally Posted by bacicat

SWMBO can hang out the clothes however she likes knowing that I will never interfere...:D

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i agree. :)

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Originally Posted by WingsOfToa

Just to throw in a light hearted answer: If she complains about the dunny seat up, do it in the sink...
Cheers,
Mik

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Wait till she's finished doing the dishes though.

:o

It seems to me any advice given in this kind of thing is based on a whole lot of assumptions? :confused: even one-on-ones are only as good as the councillor/therapist/con-artist ...

Speak to each other, communication is way under-rated! If both parties are willing to talk that's where the answers lie IMHO :)

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Originally Posted by Cobber

It seems to me any advice given in this kind of thing is based on a whole lot of assumptions? :confused: even one-on-ones are only as good as the councillor/therapist/con-artist ...

Speak to each other, communication is way under-rated! If both parties are willing to talk that's where the answers lie IMHO :)

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I totally agree about the talking and we do often, I feel at the moment though many confused messages. Last week it was you dont cycle with me on a saturday, this week its ok, you can go a ride with you mate, I shall meet the others as normal. confused messages.

[quote=dobbo;1967440]

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Why can't they invent something for us to marry instead of women?

--FRED FLINTSTONE/QUOTE]


enough said.

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The way things are going , you soon will " Another Man ":D:D:Dcheers jimr1.

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Originally Posted by Cobber

Speak to each other, communication is way under-rated! If both parties are willing to talk that's where the answers lie IMHO :)

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^ This.

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Originally Posted by Disco Muppet

^ This.

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x2.

Communication can feel like banging your head against an engine block at times.

One of the most helpful things I learnt on a course was to do with communication - specifically stonewalling.

When someone stonewalls ie, goes silent, don't relate, don't make eye contact, its actually a normal psychological reaction to being emotionally overloaded.
BUT...and here's the critical lesson.... to the person who isn't stonewalling - it looks like the stonewaller is just being difficult, refusing to talk, or doesn't care anymore. So...the non-stonewaller gets angry...which then adds to the emotional loading on the stonewaller making things worse.

When I did something to upset my wife it used to take 2 hours for her to talk to me. Most of that was because I kept trying to get her to talk - I made it worse.
Finally learnt the stonewalling thing, now I shut up and wait. Once she's figured out how she feels and why she tells me - usually in a calm voice and we go from there.

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Originally Posted by carjunkieanon

When I did something to upset my wife it used to take 2 hours for her to talk to me.

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2 hours...

Mine takes up to 2 days....

It's blissfully quiet ;)

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Originally Posted by Tombie

2 hours...

Mine takes up to 2 days....

It's blissfully quiet ;)

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Isn't it always quiet in the desert Mike? :p

Dont expect consistency mate.