Thread: The anonymous postings investigation...

So now the promised update.

Arriving at work I was advised the package addressed only with the word "digger" was located on the front doorstep. The package was wrapped in brown plain paper, it reminded me of the kind of paper that shopping bags used used to be made from.

Fixed to the front of the parcel was a typed label other than that no markings at all.

Originally it was reported that there had been an anonymous tip that the parcel was there and that a deep raspy breathing had been heard with in.

i swung all the Resources at my command into action, both of them, at once!

The area was evacuated, the air corridor overhead was closed, water mains under the building were isolated... This had become a challenge.....

Building was built in the 1970s like so many others it was built for price and practicality not to be stylish or to impress. It was opened before computers and so along the government green coloured walls, running parallel with the green and black flecked lino cold floor was plastic conduit containing wires on which billions of bits of information travelled every minute, the mere numbers beggared belief. The access to any information on the interweb, at any speed (so long as it was ADSL2) which was available in a pinch!

Access to all of that information was available but still wouldn't help me unless I could find out what was in that package.

I re-entered the building, my senses heightened, I could feel my heart begin to race, sweat began to appear on my Brow and Neck even though it is more akin to arctic weather than summer outside!

I found the suit they gave me made me feel claustrophobic, I don't usually suffer, but wearing this bulky "good year tyre man" looking green suit, one of the largest ballistic rated helmets and gloves more like oven mitts, I felt I was better suited to going to the moon rather than back into the office.

I bounded forward in much the same way a building does, what I mean is I lent forward and pulled my legs under me to stagger in the right direction. Looking around I realise the dark windowless tomb that is the typing room was in fact probably the best place in which to have me blown apart if it has to happen, for a few reasons.

One, it would contain the blast, sure the roof skylight about 15 foot above would shatter and fall in, the compressed straw ceiling panels so trendy when the place was opened would surely fall but because of how they were made and treated they would most likely not catch alight.

Two, The old furniture would be blown into the sides of the room but after a good wash to remove the bits that formally were me, would probably still be usable.

Three, lastly the place needs a good paint and the one way to make sure they do that is to coat the walls in blood splatter and brain matter.

The package sat on the desk in front of the computer although it appeared wrapped very carefully, it looked like it was covered only in paper and not sealed in any way. It appeared wrapped with attention to detail, very neatly, in fact much the same way my grandmother used to wrap stuff for birthdays and Christmas, neat folds and very few creases. Somehow I suspect that this was not socks....

I moved even closer, sweat dripping down my neck running down my back feeling like a river flowing. I reached for the parcel.. I hesitated... it was about 12 cm tall, maybe 15 cm across, about 25 cm long. I saw there was a flap folded at either end and that these were secured in place with mere sticky tape.

I pulled gently at the flap at one end, and mused if I opened it away from myself, maybe it would limit the blast?

Who am I kidding I thought , The suit will only keep the body in a easily removable state if I'm lucky! I removed the gloves, and started working again..the small piece of clear tape came away fairly easily.......

With sweat now fogging the inside of the helmet visor, I slowly opened the flap... I moved the parcel to face the other way, I repeat the gentle opening of the flap at that end... Now for the moment of truth, shaking, I slowly unfolded the flaps,hoping against hope it was all a mistake or maybe a dream...

Suddenly as i move the paper bit further everything went black!


there was silence ?

so that's it when you die is it? I asked myself.

I was feeling no pain so I suppose it could've been worse and I figured my chips had been cashed...then I heard a crackle and a voice I knew

"Digger" it said
"Yes?"I Answered
"Come towards the light" the voice said,

I had heard people who had had near death experiences say that they went towards the light but then went away and went back into their body, so I figured this was not a good idea for me especially if my body had been blown to pieces!

I moved around slow and almost struggled to move, behind me was a bright light I moved towards it working hard to get there but did so within half a minute I walked into the pool of light, "what now?" I asked, hoping the angel sent for me would reveal himself........

"We wait for someone to fix the fuse of course", my sergeant said.

"Bugger, I'm still here", I thought.

10 minutes later I had removed the suit and the lights had been re illuminated in the office. I walked back inside and saw only a small piece of the packing brown paper was still over the parcel, determined, I moved over and gingerly lifted the paper aside.

I was shocked when I saw it, it took a while to take it all in and then alongside the contents of the parcel I saw a white slip of paper.

I've picked up the anonymous printed note. The writing looking like maybe 11 or 12 size font to me, times new roman maybe, I saw it was in bold.... someone was sending me a message.


Evidence photo



Inside the parcel was this;

Evidence photo





The "Darthdeadly" invader of my privacy was fitted with a button on his chest, Reading the box and examining the " body" I assumed it would light the two LED lights fitted, one on each of the base of either foot.

But had it been rewired?

Would I be game to push the button?

I knew these post by shirtings would escalate into something nasty... I warned you all.

Accepting my fate I went outside to don the big bulky suit again.....




Will our hero survive?



Will our hero get sprayed all over the room (like hot butter on a steaming crumpet) by a Star Wars bomb? ( and I don't mean the last movie either?)

Tune in again to find out...

Same Batty forum
Same Batty thread
Same Batty time!!

<Grabs a Cornetto and sits down to await next thrilling instalment>

Originally Posted by Tombie

<Grabs a Cornetto and sits down to await next thrilling instalment>

Do you want anything from the shop then?

Bugger. I've just been to the Movies and eaten a giant bucket of Popcorn. There's no room for anything else.

Liter-a-cola

Sent from my HTC One using AULRO mobile app

Post by Shirtings.. When will it end?

Perhaps I should go on a holiday until this all blows over..

Did somebody say popcorn ......................