Reply With QuoteI think this would work!!!
AT REST
SubscriberGuy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender.
The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Schooner of New"
The robot brings back the best beer ever and says to the
man, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says," 168."
The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space
exploration, medical technology and Land Rovers.
The guy leaves, but he is curious...So he goes back into the bar.
The robot bartender says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Schooner of New"
Again, the robot pours a great beer and gives it to the man and asks,
"What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "100."
The robot then starts to talk about Land Rovers, V8 Super cars, MotoGP, Tooheys beers and Supercheap Auto.
The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting, so he thinks he will try it
one more time.
He goes back into the bar.
The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Schooner of New," and the robot brings him another great beer.
The robot then says, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "Uh, about 50."
The robot leans in real close and asks
"So, you people still happy you voted for Gillard?"
Roger
YarnMaster
SupporterI think this would work!!!
AT REST
THE HAIRCUT
Blessed are those that can give without remembering, and take without forgetting.
One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop.
When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for
Him at his door.
Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill , the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop.
The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you ' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.
Then a Senator came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill , the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Senator was very happy and left the shop.
The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there
were a dozen politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut.
And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.
BOTH POLITICIANS AND BABIES' NAPPIES' NEED TO BE CHANGED OFTEN AND FOR THE SAME REASON!
YarnMaster
SupporterCompulsory Viewing for Females
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6keUdzwFCHU]Manflu - The Truth - YouTube[/ame]
Master
Hilarious!Originally Posted by sashadidi
Personally I think this should be a public service announcement!!
ForumSage
SubscriberBiology Midterm
Smart student!
Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term test.
The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk,' worth
70 points or none at all.
One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages.
He wrote:
1.) It is perfect formula for the child.
2.) It provides immunity against several diseases.
3.) It is always the right temperature.
4.) It is inexpensive.
5.) It bonds the child to mother, and vice versa.
6.) It is always available as needed.
And then, the student was stuck. Finally, in desperation, just before
the bell rang indicating the end of the test, he wrote..
7.) It comes in 2 attractive reusable containers.
He got an A+
AT REST
This ones been doing the rounds for a while but still worth a look the last one looks staged
The Luckiest People On Earth - YouTube
RoverLord
Im told the last ones a scene from a movie, no-one whose told me that can tell me the name of the movie...This ones been doing the rounds for a while but still worth a look the last one looks staged
The Luckiest People On Earth - YouTube
Dave
"In a Landrover the other vehicle is your crumple zone."
For spelling call Rogets, for mechanicing call me.
Fozzy, 2.25D SIII Ex DCA Ute
TdiautoManual d1 (gave it to the Mupion)
Archaeoptersix 1990 6x6 dual cab(This things staying)
If you've benefited from one or more of my posts please remember, your taxes paid for my skill sets, I'm just trying to make sure you get your monies worth.
If you think you're in front on the deal, pay it forwards.
TopicToaster
There is a clip of the last one that has the soundtrack & you clearly hear the director shout "cut"
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral
director to play at a grave side service for a homeless man. He had
no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery
in the Kentucky back-country.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost; and being a
typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late .... and saw the funeral guy was
evidently gone, and the hearse was nowhere in sight.
There were only the diggers and crew left .... and they were eating
lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went
to the side of the grave and looked down. The vault lid was already
in place.
I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I
played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends.
I played like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played 'Amazing Grace', the workers began to weep. They
wept; I wept; we all wept together. When I finished, I packed up my
bagpipes and started for my car.
Though my head hung low, my heart was full.
As I was opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say,
"Sweet Mother of Jesus, I never seen nothin' like that before .... and
I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
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