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Thread: Jokes

  1. #6481
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    დიდება უკრაინას
    Рашка парашка

  2. #6482
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    დიდება უკრაინას
    Рашка парашка

  3. #6483
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    დიდება უკრაინას
    Рашка парашка

  4. #6484
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    Free helicopter ride

    Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter, flight for 4 people?! I'm still looking for 2 more people to join us.

    We leave early Saturday (October 17) morning from Melbourne and will fly to Rosebud Golf Club where we will have a champagne breakfast, and then on a yacht for lunch.

    Then we’ll do a flight to Lorne for dinner and watch the Footy game, then fly back home.

    Once in a lifetime opportunity !

    If interested please pm me..
    Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can't go...







  5. #6485
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeeJay View Post
    Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter, flight for 4 people?! I'm still looking for 2 more people to join us.

    We leave early Saturday (October 17) morning from Melbourne and will fly to Rosebud Golf Club where we will have a champagne breakfast, and then on a yacht for lunch.

    Then we’ll do a flight to Lorne for dinner and watch the Footy game, then fly back home.

    Once in a lifetime opportunity !

    If interested please pm me..
    Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can't go...






    You nearly had me goin' there for a split sec.

  6. #6486
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    I can’t believe how rude the suppository helpline was.

  7. #6487
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fifth Columnist View Post
    I can’t believe how rude the suppository helpline was.


    Speaking of Suppositories. A little story. Stop me if you've heard it. When in Paris years ago back in the early 80s I came down with a real heavy cold & went to the Pharmacy over the road & asked for something to relieve it SVP.

    Gave me a packet of Suppositories WTF? Couldn't read the instructions but feared the worst as you do.

    Asked back in digs, wtf am I is supposed to do with these, ie. stick them up my nose? No Swallow them? No.

    You guessed it, stick them up my arse. No kid. For a cold!! Each one was about 50mm ( French you see) 2" in length.

    Seems that is how the French prefer to do it as it supposed ( there is that SUPP word again) to absorb through the tissues etc. Me, I prefer some Vincents & a hot lemon Drink. Come to think it wouldn't want to be toooo hot to go up there & the lemon might sting a bit.


    I can tell you it was a new one on me.

  8. #6488
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    Silly as it sounded back then.... when I had a rather 'ouchy' kidney stone, one of those (glove-propelled) North-bound missiles worked an absolute treat, both quick and effective.

  9. #6489
    DiscoMick Guest
    Kidney stones are awful. When I had them, I would have done almost anything to relieve the pain, no matter how embarrassing.

  10. #6490
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    Quote Originally Posted by DiscoMick View Post
    Kidney stones are awful. When I had them, I would have done almost anything to relieve the pain, no matter how embarrassing.

    For Kidney Stones I can imagine it helping, ( believe it is excruciating) but I guess it would be rare to get KS after taking a "Medication" for a common cold.

    Besides, I am not partial to shoving things up my date, but 2" wax like rockets may have started me on a downward spiral to Buggery & Purgatory .. What next, Cucumbers, Beer bottles, the olde Coke Bottle, Broom Handles? I believe the Medical profession see all sorts of stuff up peoples arses but not mine they haven't.

    No incentive for me as my Prostate, allegedly the source of great pleasure for some blokes, was removed years ago.

    I'll stick to Vincents & a hot, but not too hot, lemon drink ta very much.

    Now where did I put those lemons? No, not up my arse.

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