Thread: Jokes

During training exercises, the lieutenant who was driving down a muddy back roadencountered another vehicle stuck in the mud with a red-faced colonel at the wheel. "Your Land Rover stuck, sir?" asked the lieutenant as he pulledalongside "Nope," replied the colonel, coming over and handing himthe keys "Yours is."

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Husband:
My wife is missing.
She went to rescue people from the flood yesterday and did not come home ...
Police Station Sergeant:
What is her height?
Husband:
I'm not sure. More than five feet tall.
Sergeant:
Weight?
Husband:
Do not know. Not thin, not really that heavy.
Sergeant:
Eye color?
Husband:
Like brown, I don't remember exactly.
Sergeant:
Hair color?
Husband:
It changes twice a year.
Maybe dark brown now.
I do not remember.
Sergeant:
What was she wearing?
Husband:
Can be pants, or can be a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.
Sergeant:
What kind of car did she get into?
Husband:
She left in my jeep.
Sergeant:
What kind of jeep is it?
Husband:
2010 Rubicon with Sprintex Supercharger with Intercooler, DiabloSport T-1000 Trinity Programmer, Teraflex Falcon 3.3 Shocks ,1350 RE Reel Drive Shafts, Method 105 Bead Locks, Toyo 37" X 13.5" Tires, Custom Olympic Off Road Front Bumper, Olympic Off Road Smuggler Rear Bumper with tire carrier, Seward Radius 4s LED Light, Seward 12" LED Light bar, 50" LED Light bar with, sPod LED switch pod with Boost gage,, Rigid LED Lights, 15# Power Tank, Rock Hard Cage, Rock Hard Under Armor, Posion Spyder Sliders, Posion Spyder Crusher Fenders, Posion Spyder Evap Armor, Posion Spyder Extreme Duty Trans-Mount Cross Member, Bushwacker rear armor, 5.13 Gears, Magnum 44 Front Axle, Off Road Evolution "C" Gussets, Cobra 75 CB Radio, Warn 10K on Front and 8K Winch on Rear, Bartact Seat Covers, Delta Quad Bar Xenon Headlamps, Tantrum LED Offroad Rock Lights, Teraflex HD Tie Rod, Teraflex Falcon Steering Stabilizer, Teraflex Alpine Long Control Arms Front & Rear, Teraflex 4" springs, Teraflex JK Performance Slotted Big Rotor Kit, TeraFlex Monster HD Forged Front Adjustable Trackbar, Teraflex Front & Rear Brake Line Kit, Teraflex Bump Stops Front & Rear, Surprise Straps, Hothead Headliner, Teraflex D-44 Diff Covers, Wild Boar Grille, Rigid Ridge Hood, Drake Hood Latch's & a Tuffy Security Drawer...
Sergeant:
Don't worry my friend. Let us find your jeep...✋

My Dry January resolution is going so well my favourite shoes have lost their sticky beer sound.

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Originally Posted by RANDLOVER

My Dry January resolution is going so well my favourite shoes have lost their sticky beer sound.

A bugger init? Trying to sneak in at night they are a dead Giveaway.


Usually if you throw them at a wall they stick there for a couple of days.

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