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Thread: Canvassers

  1. #1
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    Canvassers

    I have a new strategy for phone canvassers. One which works especially well for persons of Asian location claiming to be calling from Melbourne, and whom the general population of Australia simply cannot understand, adding to the frustration and resentment of being called as you are sitting down to dinner or necking a cold brew.

    Mumble.

    That's right. Without moving your jaw or your lips, you grunt with greatly animated expression, without actually uttering a single intelligable verse, achieving the quintessential thick Australian drawl.
    Think John Williamson, bingeing on a cocktail of morphine, valium & beer.
    Now, it may not come easily to you, so you may have to practice this technique at every available opportunity until you are satisfied you have perfected it. Try it on the next person who calls you asking if you are interested participating in a phone survey or whether you would like to change phone services or would like to buy timeshare.
    I promise you, they're gonna love it.

  2. #2
    MickS Guest
    The telco that my mobile phone comes from has there service centre in Mumbai (probably next door to my bank's service centre). Anyway, whenever I have to ring, they answer the phone, in their best indian accent, stating "Hello and welcome to *****, you are speaking with Johnno, how can I help you?" I've also had Kylie, Sharon, Gary ...the list goes on. I'm waiting for Bazza or Macca next.

    Mick

  3. #3
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    Its that VOIP delay that's really annoying. Whether they're in the next suburb or across the world, they all sound like they're from India. TPG do it all seemingly on VOIP and its really annoying. VOIP to VOIP would no doubt be an extra terrestrial experience - Phone home!!!!
    Cheers
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  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Numpty's Missus
    Wherever they come from, there is a pause when you pick up the phone. I find that I can say hello twice before they speak...hence...if I say hello twice with no answer....I HANG UP!!

    I don't seem to be bothered by canvassers for some reason
    Yep I had an argument with one over that. You can also hear the click as they switch over. They claimed it's because the operator doesn't get the call till you answere. So I told them that I would hang up in future and that's what I do wait till they start speaking and click. After 4-5 attempt's I let them talk to me.

  5. #5
    numpty's Avatar
    numpty is offline TopicToaster Silver Subscriber
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    And I thought canvassers were who made tents.

    It's amazing wot won kan lern on this site.
    Numpty

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  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by oldzook
    I have a new strategy for phone canvassers. One which works especially well for persons of Asian location claiming to be calling from Melbourne, and whom the general population of Australia simply cannot understand, adding to the frustration and resentment of being called as you are sitting down to dinner or necking a cold brew.

    Mumble.

    That's right. Without moving your jaw or your lips, you grunt with greatly animated expression, without actually uttering a single intelligable verse, achieving the quintessential thick Australian drawl.
    Think John Williamson, bingeing on a cocktail of morphine, valium & beer.
    Now, it may not come easily to you, so you may have to practice this technique at every available opportunity until you are satisfied you have perfected it. Try it on the next person who calls you asking if you are interested participating in a phone survey or whether you would like to change phone services or would like to buy timeshare.
    I promise you, they're gonna love it.
    If someone rings ME when im sittin down to tea and i answer the phone and i dont know them or cant understand them i put them on to my mum and then SWMBO yells at them until they hang up unless shes in a good mood

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Numpty's Missus
    Wherever they come from, there is a pause when you pick up the phone. I find that I can say hello twice before they speak...hence...if I say hello twice with no answer....I HANG UP!!

    I don't seem to be bothered by canvassers for some reason
    The last telemarketer I spoke with had that time delay. When I asked her why the delay she told me that her computer dials numbers at random then if any answer it phones her.

    This is why you should just hand up during the delay. That way the computer thinks that you are not at home.

    Try it sometime.

  8. #8
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    We have caller I.D. and never get calls from overseas, unless its these dunces.
    Worth the money, especially for mother in law .
    We never answer the O.S ones, but they keep on calling...

  9. #9
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    Canvassers

    The solution I have is, if they call while I'm sitting down for tea. I'll say hold on a minute, put the phone down, and continue eating. I figure if they want to be included on my dinner, they can listen in. Every so often I can hear a faint "Hello?, Hello? coming from the phone. Have only done this a few times, and my wife hates it when I do it, but I get a lot of satisfaction from it.

    Ken

  10. #10
    p38arover's Avatar
    p38arover is offline Major part of the heart and soul of AULRO.com
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    If I answer the phone and there is a delay, I hang up.

    If someone rings my mobile and my phone displays "Private Number", I usually don't answer it.


    Ron
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