Thread: Yanks love LRs off road more than anything else

I liked this, might be a couple on here that has broken the 10th commandment


Ten Commandments of Land Rover Ownership

1) Thou shall not Bling Bling thy Rover. Ghettoizing or installing 20″ wheels, chrome wheels, or wheels with spinners is not allowed and is punishable by car crusher or forced sale on a shady used car lot.

2) Thou shall never leave thy fellow Rover behind. Failure to assist a disabled or God forbid stuck Rover shall be punishable by banishment from his or her club or by keel hauling thru the mud with thy pants down.

3) Thou shall not drink and drive. It is permissible to drive first then drink. Drinking while driving is a jeep thing.

4) Thou shall not modify thy Land Rover for only trips to the mall, grocery store or soccer practice. Failure to frequently drive off-road a modified Land Rover shall bring upon the Owner the title of “Mall Queen”

5) Thou shall not sacrifice thy Land Rover as a parts truck without a proper Christening by 12 year old bottle of Scotch. Failure to first “Take a swig” shall make void the first Christening and shall force the Owner to buy another 12 year old bottle of Scotch and try again.

6) Thou shall wave while passing other Land Rovers regardless of type or gender. Failure of the other Rover driver to return a friendly wave may result in the first waiver to point his or her middle finger instead.

7) Thou shall not use gas with an octane rating lower than 91. Smelly exhaust is a by product of Bad Gas. Rover owners who have Bad Gas must camp down wind of the camp site.

8) Thou shall not eat Egg Beaters for breakfast while on a Rover outing. Improper ingestion of Egg Beaters may contribute to smelly exhaust. “My eggs will break” is not a legitimate excuse as real Land Rover drivers don’t break their eggs while on the trail. Punishment for eating Egg Beaters is the forced drinking of warm Bud Lite for the remainder of the trip.

9) Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s rover. As a Land Rover Owner it is your responsibility to build a stronger more capable rover than thy neighbor’s rover with at least a roof rack, hella lights, after market bumper, lift kit, sliders, winch, bigger tires and stickers.

10) Thou shall not own more than 4 Land Rovers at any one time. Because the law of diminishing returns does not apply to Land Rover ownership, Rover Owners risk the law of bankruptcy or threat of divorce by spending all their time and money on maintenance and mods.

Good God! Did you see that 7.4% of BMW X3's were taken off-road!

I wonder if any of them made it back on-road. They are just glorified 3-series station wagons for people with more money than sense.

I like this in the Forbes article:

"In many ways, this makes
a luxury SUV the vehicular equivalent of costly professional-quality stove and oven ranges sold to wealthy people who don’t cook much but would like to think they have the tools to whip up a gourmet meal if the need ever arises."

and don't forget the 10.5% of Porsche Cayenne's.... WTF???

The people who drive X3's and Cayenne's think that "off-road" means there is grass or gravel under the tyres. 10% of Cayenne drivers park the car on the footpath when they wash (correction, their servant washes) it - clearly "off road." 7% of X3 drivers have driven their car to the carpark in a National park - it was gravel so that's "off road."

Loved the "Best of Maob" picture at the bottom of the link.

I think this is appropriate...

hmmm.... Prestige Off Road Capable.............
Where are the JEEPS??????
Not a mention...... Lexus have gott 'em