Had to go back to this one re my father.I do not know why but when you posted this it touched something.My father died 11 years ago and i have never mourned him,never talk about him unless my mother brings him up.Made me think why we did not become good friends.After i left last night i realised what it was that prevented us from being so.He was a very selfish man without knowing it,he wanted his idea of the best for me without asking what i wanted.My mother would cook him a meal for him and when he got home he would say he was really looking forward to a different meal.He taught me sailing,for which i thank him,but only because he was going sailing and if i wanted to be with him,that's what i had to do.
When he found out that he had terminal cancer,he wanted my mother to commit suicide with him so that he did not have to worry about her future.That is why I made the commitment to look after her to him.Then when in hospital he asked me to put him out of his misery by smothering him with a pillow,never thinking what that would do to me.That is why I may come across as somewhat callous in my previous statements about him,i guess.I never realised that I had this resentment of his attitude until last night,and I am glad that i have got rid of it.Sorry folks,did not mean to go on that long

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