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Thread: Off to buy the wife some flowers

  1. #1
    klappers Guest

    Off to buy the wife some flowers

    Thought I might need some brownie points....

    You never know when they come in handy..

    She should be stoked because at the same time I am getting us some STAUNS !!!

  2. #2
    austastar's Avatar
    austastar is offline YarnMaster Silver Subscriber
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    Very appropriate I would say too.

  3. #3
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    You can use that trick just so many times - I now get, "what have you done wrong"? when I bring flowers home.
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    austastar's Avatar
    austastar is offline YarnMaster Silver Subscriber
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    Ah har! the trick is to throw in some false negatives every so often.
    i.e. "just because you're worth it" etc
    You had better mean it though - they can see right through a scam.
    cheers

  5. #5
    klappers Guest
    Lol.. they sure do see through a scam!

    But i think the key thing is that we now have some stauns lol

  6. #6
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    Why not give her the stauns instead of flowers
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    see thats why i buy flowers when i dont do something wrong because it earns you points than but if you buy them when your in the S$%^ than its nto good coz your still in the s$%^

  8. #8
    klappers Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by stooge View Post
    Why not give her the stauns instead of flowers
    thats what i was thinking

  9. #9
    austastar's Avatar
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    Brownie Points

    Make the woman happy. Do something she likes and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects...Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
    Here is a guide to the point system.

    Simple Duties:
    You make the bed..+1
    You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pllows..0
    You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets..-1
    You leave the toilet seat up..-5
    You leave the toilet lid down..-10 after the lights are out..-30
    You replace the toilet-paper roll when it's empty..0
    When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex..-1
    When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom..-2
    You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with wings..+5
    But return with beer ..-5
    You check out a suspicious noise at night ...0
    You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing..0
    You check out a suspicious noise and it's something..+5
    You pummel it with a six iron..+10
    It's her father..-10
    Social Engagements:
    You stay by her side the entire party..0
    You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college drinking buddy..-2
    Named Tiffany..-4
    Tiffany is a dancer..-6
    Tiffany has implants..-8
    Her Birthday:
    You take her out to dinner..0
    You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar ......+1
    Okay, it is a sports bar..-2
    And it's all-you-can-eat night..-3
    It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team..-10
    A Night Out With The Boys:
    Go out with a pal ..-5
    And the pal is happily married ..-4
    Or frighteningly single ..-7
    And he drives a Mustang..-10
    With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED) ..-15
    A Night Out:
    You take her to a movie..+2
    You take her to a movie she likes..+4
    You take her to a movie you hate..+6
    You take her to a movie you like..-2
    It's called DeathCop 3..-3
    Which features cyborgs having sex..-9
    You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans .........-15
    Your Physique:
    You develop a noticeable potbelly..-15
    You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it....+10
    You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts ..-30
    You say "I don't give a damn because you have one too"...-800
    The Big Question:
    She asks, "Do I look fat?" ..-5
    You hesitate in responding..-10
    You reply, "Where?"..-35
    Communication:
    When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression ..0
    When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes..+5
    You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV..+10
    She realizes this is because you've fallen asleep..-20

  10. #10
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    Can we meet Tiffany?
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