The Stories Thread

[gghaggis]

We're having our driveway re-concreted, so they dug up the old one yesterday and left me a nice 40m stretch of dirt to park in. 6am this morning and they're outside bashing retaining planks into the dirt and generally ensuring that last night's headache won't be forgotten quite as soon as I would have liked.

7am and a large Mercedes cement truck (apparently they make cars as well?) backs down the drive and starts pouring. I'm outside looking on as the young bloke explains how the truck inches forward as they pour, to keep the out-flow constant. Did I mention the dirt? Oh, and that the driveway is at a 10deg incline? I nonchalantly reply that the truck seems to be inching _down_ rather than forward. Much scurrying around later and yep, the truck is bogged. Full of concrete. Costing me $!**# per hour. 90mins to get another truck around to pull them out. The older bloke wanders up and eyes off the Rangie:

"Recon yous could pull the truck up the driveway? How much will that tow?"
Hmm - "Around 3 1/2 tonne" I reply, "Why, what's the truck weigh?"
"Ooh, I dunno, around 20 tonne?"

He helpfully adds that he's got a chain. Ah well ..........

Of course, the chain won't reach all the way to the road, and somehow the humour of me helpfully asking them to move the truck forward a couple of metres is rather lost. So I back the Rangie into the driveway, wheels in the dirt, engage low range, Rock Crawl and lock into 1st gear. A rather large chain is attached to the rear tow point and I take up the strain. Thumbs up from the grinning psycopath in the truck and I give it a little more revs. A slight shudder and then she just _walks_ forward. No spinning, no straining - the truck rises out of the hole in the drive and I pull it up the drive a few more metres.

The old bloke walks up to my driver's window - "Jeez, these things have got a bit of guts, don't they?"

They sure do

[Ean Austral]

This is a brief but funny story ( now we look back at it ) on our test drive of the D3..

Our D2 is getting the front prop shaft changed so we decide to take the D3 for a drive..Swmbo drives from TRS and absolutely fangs the D3 and we take off like a rocket, so she drives down to about Glenelg area, then says to me drive back..

I hop in and because SWMBO is shorter than me I move the seat back but cant see the speedo properly, so we are coming up the hill back towards lonsdale and im trying to find the steering adjustment..so i grab something that feels as tho it should be the steering coloum adjustment, (we are in peak hour traffic in the middle lane) and the car goes dead..Not a light on the dash, nothing..WE MANAGE TO GET THE CAR TO THE EMERGENCY LANE.. and just sit there wondering what the hell happened.

Now I have been in some strange situations at sea, but being in a car you know nothing about and its totally dead is something very new to me..
So we just sit for awhile, then SWMBO starts with the..WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO..

Well to cut a long story short, and something I still get reminded of, I turned the car off, thinking the Key was the steering coloum adjustment knob..Re-start the car and drove back trouble free, but boy its a strange feeling sitting in a dead car you know nothing about..

Doesn't compare to some stories on here but as I say is funny now but at the time...

Cheers Ean

[Celtoid]

This is a brief but funny story ( now we look back at it ) on our test drive of the D3..

Our D2 is getting the front prop shaft changed so we decide to take the D3 for a drive..Swmbo drives from TRS and absolutely fangs the D3 and we take off like a rocket, so she drives down to about Glenelg area, then says to me drive back..

I hop in and because SWMBO is shorter than me I move the seat back but cant see the speedo properly, so we are coming up the hill back towards lonsdale and im trying to find the steering adjustment..so i grab something that feels as tho it should be the steering coloum adjustment, (we are in peak hour traffic in the middle lane) and the car goes dead..Not a light on the dash, nothing..WE MANAGE TO GET THE CAR TO THE EMERGENCY LANE.. and just sit there wondering what the hell happened.

Now I have been in some strange situations at sea, but being in a car you know nothing about and its totally dead is something very new to me..
So we just sit for awhile, then SWMBO starts with the..WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO..

Well to cut a long story short, and something I still get reminded of, I turned the car off, thinking the Key was the steering coloum adjustment knob..Re-start the car and drove back trouble free, but boy its a strange feeling sitting in a dead car you know nothing about..

Doesn't compare to some stories on here but as I say is funny now but at the time...

Cheers Ean

I know the feeling...bought myD4 as an ex demo....from Cairns, I live in Brissy.

Go to the depot to pick the car up...get handed this fob thingy.

I stand looking at my new purchase....opening it wasn't too hard...but start?! How do I do that? Sheepishly I have to ask the admin person to get the guy who took it off the truck, to show me how to start it and turn off the hand-brake.....

Smiled all the way home thou...for a different reason.......the D4 rocks....

[Disco4SE]

Hi all,
A few months back, I purchased a set of second hand RRS rims with MTR's. Put them on for the first time this afternoon to see how they go, as I am planning some off roading next weekend.
First impressions after driving on Scorpian ATR's is that they hum like a bastard on the road.
Anyway, we are no more than 5 minutes from home when my son and I decide to take an 'impassable when wet' track that we haven't been down for a while. Went well to start with until we found ourselves stranded with no wheels touching firm ground. Tried every setting the vehicle has and still no luck.
As a last resort, I rang my mate who has a Nissan Patrol........sorry for swearing, to help me out. He tried snatching first, but the ground was too spongy and he was starting to bury himself (even with a front diff lock).
He ended up winching me out after nearly burning out his winch motor.
So, this was my very first experience with MTR's and only for 5 minutes.
Check out the pics below.




BTW: How can I be sure that I have an e-diff?
MOD EDIT: you read the FAQ!

Cheers, Craig

[Gaviatrix]

I just thought I'd add my h'a'penn'orth to this thread, much in the DiscoSaffa mode.

You see, our D3 has made a car convert out of my wife.

Now you need to realise that there have been all sorts of 'interesting' cars in the Gaviatrix stable over the last 20+ years. We had a D1 Tdi, which was a favourite with our kids. I've had periods of being a real Italian car tragic and have lost a small fortune running Alfas and Fiats and Lancias - even a 1967 Maserati Quattroporte. I've had Citroens (a 2CV6 and a DS), Triumphs, proper Minis, a Volvo, a Peugeot, several BMWs, an Audi and my lasting love, a beautiful Jaguar XJ6. She likes the XJ, mainly for its effortless grunt and cosseting interior.

But the D3 is the first car ever that she actually, actively likes, tells her friends about AND is interested in finding out how it works. She's asked me questions about MECHANICAL things, for heavens sake. When we went to one of Gordon's (Green Oval) seminars, she lapped it up and has been telling our teenage boys all about the air suspension and traction control - to their utter amazement. She has not even objected to me buying all sorts of additional kit and .... wait for it .... when I told her it was booked in for a compressor and an ARB bar to be installed she actually suggested we got a winch as well. You could have knocked me over with the proverbial feather.

That was a week ago and I'm still recovering. Our marriage may never be the same.

[gps-au]

I just thought I'd add my h'a'penn'orth to this thread, much in the DiscoSaffa mode.

You see, our D3 has made a car convert out of my wife.

Now you need to realise that there have been all sorts of 'interesting' cars in the Gaviatrix stable over the last 20+ years. We had a D1 Tdi, which was a favourite with our kids. I've had periods of being a real Italian car tragic and have lost a small fortune running Alfas and Fiats and Lancias - even a 1967 Maserati Quattroporte. I've had Citroens (a 2CV6 and a DS), Triumphs, proper Minis, a Volvo, a Peugeot, several BMWs, an Audi and my lasting love, a beautiful Jaguar XJ6. She likes the XJ, mainly for its effortless grunt and cosseting interior.

But the D3 is the first car ever that she actually, actively likes, tells her friends about AND is interested in finding out how it works. She's asked me questions about MECHANICAL things, for heavens sake. When we went to one of Gordon's (Green Oval) seminars, she lapped it up and has been telling our teenage boys all about the air suspension and traction control - to their utter amazement. She has not even objected to me buying all sorts of additional kit and .... wait for it .... when I told her it was booked in for a compressor and an ARB bar to be installed she actually suggested we got a winch as well. You could have knocked me over with the proverbial feather.

That was a week ago and I'm still recovering. Our marriage may never be the same.

She got a sister ?

[shelbyjet]

It is not often in life you get to feel the way I feel right now... I don't know how some of you guys who have waited months for your cars to arrive coped.

Last week, with the wife's hormones all screwed up due, in part, to the upcoming addition to our family,agreed that it would be easier for the 4 (nearly 5) of us if we had a seven seater. Eager to pounce, particularly before the hormones change again, I shopped around for a suitable vehicle.

My first choice was a MY10 D4 2.7. Then, for a couple of grand more (sounded like very little at the time) I figured I could get a MY10 3.0 - new base line. From there, all I had to do was convince myself I was only adding a tiny bit each time I saw a new cool gadget (we all pretend we don't, but I do love gadgets)...

In the course of the week, I was using a new babies milk bottle to justify the need for a centre console cool box! After all, it was only a little bit more...

Oh oh... Put it all together, it is more than just a little bit, actually considerably more than the 2.7 I first looked at. Thank god it is end of year, I made a very special offer to a dealer for a stock car, promising settlement before the end of financial year (hence 2 days) and he capitulated.

So, the feeling of utter excitement and pure indulgence continues for two more days. I cannot wait, but at the same time, I want to keep feeling like this. It has been over 30 years since I could not sleep on Christmas eve, now, as a much older kid, I am feeling that way again - I may start giggling.

What makes the deal even better is that the car is in Queensland and I live in Sydney. They say that the most gratifying drive of your new car is the first drive home - mine is a long drive!

So, I am proud to say (and the bank is very happy to have approved a massive loan) that on the last day of the year, I will be driving home in my new MY11 3.0 HSE with 20", premium leather, surround camera, RSE, Hybrid TV, cooler box (wife does like that idea) all the tricky headlights and tinted windows!

I will be sad to have to part with my beloved R36 but I am sure the pain will be short lived.

PS - sorry for gloating, but is that not what kids do at Christmas???

[Jon79f]

It is not often in life you get to feel the way I feel right now... I don't know how some of you guys who have waited months for your cars to arrive coped.

Last week, with the wife's hormones all screwed up due, in part, to the upcoming addition to our family,agreed that it would be easier for the 4 (nearly 5) of us if we had a seven seater. Eager to pounce, particularly before the hormones change again, I shopped around for a suitable vehicle.

My first choice was a MY10 D4 2.7. Then, for a couple of grand more (sounded like very little at the time) I figured I could get a MY10 3.0 - new base line. From there, all I had to do was convince myself I was only adding a tiny bit each time I saw a new cool gadget (we all pretend we don't, but I do love gadgets)...

In the course of the week, I was using a new babies milk bottle to justify the need for a centre console cool box! After all, it was only a little bit more...

Oh oh... Put it all together, it is more than just a little bit, actually considerably more than the 2.7 I first looked at. Thank god it is end of year, I made a very special offer to a dealer for a stock car, promising settlement before the end of financial year (hence 2 days) and he capitulated.

So, the feeling of utter excitement and pure indulgence continues for two more days. I cannot wait, but at the same time, I want to keep feeling like this. It has been over 30 years since I could not sleep on Christmas eve, now, as a much older kid, I am feeling that way again - I may start giggling.

What makes the deal even better is that the car is in Queensland and I live in Sydney. They say that the most gratifying drive of your new car is the first drive home - mine is a long drive!

So, I am proud to say (and the bank is very happy to have approved a massive loan) that on the last day of the year, I will be driving home in my new MY11 3.0 HSE with 20", premium leather, surround camera, RSE, Hybrid TV, cooler box (wife does like that idea) all the tricky headlights and tinted windows!

I will be sad to have to part with my beloved R36 but I am sure the pain will be short lived.

PS - sorry for gloating, but is that not what kids do at Christmas???

I am sure you will be happy with it - I sold my R36 Wagon for my RRS 3.0TDV6 and couldn't be happier. Wasn't the R36 a great car though!

[shelbyjet]

I am sure you will be happy with it - I sold my R36 Wagon for my RRS 3.0TDV6 and couldn't be happier. Wasn't the R36 a great car though!

It is a simply brilliant car. The DSG gearbox mated to that engine is simply awesome. I am sure come Thursday, I will be happy enough!

[jonesfam]

This is a bit involved so hang in there.

The Bad.
Recently got myself a new dog, Queensland Mastiff, a cross between a Bull Mastiff, Neo Mastiff & Rottweiler. 12 months old & 55kg, a big dog.
Have had the Grandson (4) for a couple of weeks, all going well, he likes our Foster kids & is having a good time. Last Saturday, the day before he was due to go home, he & our 4 boys are up in the play tower laying on the floor calling the new dog. Dog (Bronco) jumps up & grabs Grandson on the face. Lots of blood a bit of screaming & off to hospital we go.
Thought no big deal, couple of stitches & he'll be OK, have a bit of a scar to impress the girls with.
Doctor turns up, that top cut is just under his eye, have to have a surgeon stitch it to make sure there is no nerve or eye lid damage, great.
1 hour latter I & the Grandson are on the RFDS plane to Mt Isa, my daughter & son in law have left Townsville to drive to Mt Isa & I'm feeling pretty bad about the dog.

The Good.
That night I phone the missus to let her know how things are going, she says since Corvin's Mum & Dad will be there by morning no point in me hanging about so she will drive down Sunday morning (this all happened last week-end) & pick me up.
She arrives Mt Isa Sunday about 1pm, all good in the Discovery with 5 Foster kids. Gets out & says the trip was good & that the car saved their lives!
How? Well she was driving down the hills road doing about 90 as it was in good nick, comes up a rise to a grid, slows a little crosses the grid straight into a deep, wide & rough bull dust hole. Everything ends up terribly sideways & on a lean that feels like it's all going to POO! She tries to steer into the slide but it's still looking about as bad as it gets, "We're stuffed!" she thinks, "We're going over" when the car does it's thing & shes back on 4 wheels heading more or less in the correct direction & slowed right down.
So as far as she is concerned the car saved her & that is that. Loves it even more now.
Just to make things a bit better the surgeon does a great job on Corvin & we're all smiles.

The Ugly.
So at about 5:30pm we head for home up the hills road me driving & the kids watching DVDs. The hills road runs from about 100k West of Mt Isa up to Gregory Downs. It's not a bad road but is quite rocky & has some twist & turns. I'm cruising along at 95 when I see a blade of rock sticking out of the road so I head to the left, just hit the rocks with the drivers side tyres & hear that THUNK, THUNK of a flat tyre.
It's dark by now so first thing I do is reach for the torch in the glove box, the torch has a flat battery, great.
The Missus sets the kids up on blanket in the middle of the road to have some BBQ chicken for dinner & I start changing a tyre in the bitch black.
First problem, find the little hole in the rail that the jack has to go into, takes a while.
Second problem, get the holder on the end of the spare tyre winch through the wheel center hole that seems so small, takes a while.
Third problem, trying to line up the wheel studs without being able to see them. 1 crushed finger & cut hand latter the spare it on, the flat wound up & the jack etc stowed away, took a while.
We finally arrive home at about 11:30.

So, an interesting week-end. The decision has been made to buy a head lamp thing, 2 X LED torches & a second spare wheel & tyre. The flat tyre has been sent to Mt Isa for repair but most importantly my wife not only had the confidence to drive the car to Mt Isa she took the hills road & now has even more confidence in the D3. Not necessarily the tyres though.

Love the D3 & would happily shoot the bloke who designed the spare tyre system as well as the bloke who decided 19" tyres were a good idea.
Jonesfam
PS The dog is still about & did not get poisoned. he was just playing & unfortunately got the young fella just wrong. Neither my Daughter or Corvin have any malice towards the dog.