Thread: Words of Wisdom?

THE FUNNY SIDE

Embrace your relationship by always laughing at your parteners jokes.
If your parteners jokes arent funny laugh at his little penis instead


INNER PEACE

Find inner peace by clenching and unclenching your buttocks at least twenty times a day



next The Child Within and Finding Out Who You Are

Originally Posted by ramblingboy42

THE FUNNY SIDE

Embrace your relationship by always laughing at your parteners jokes.
If your parteners jokes arent funny laugh at his little penis instead

What should you do in this instance if your partner is a lady? ...

cheers,
Terry

Originally Posted by TerryO

What should you do in this instance if your partner is a lady? ...

cheers,
Terry

I looked at it this way, wondering what this meant (partener) was it (your partner) or (your part in her) jokes, which would fit with you said Terry














































Baz

THE CHILD WITHIN

Finding the child within yourself may be harder than you think.
Buy a cuddly toy and take it to bed with you.
Use it rediscover the child-self you thought you had lost forever.
Keep in touch with this child-self wherever you go.
Throw tantrums with people who wont let you have your way.
Eat too much chocolate and be sick.
Show your partener your anger by wetting the bed.

FINDING OUT WHO YOU ARE

The best way to find out who you are is to go up to somebody who knows who you are and say "Hello, who am I?"
Looking at your name in a drivers license or passport is another useful way of finding out who you are.

next....negative feelings & death

NEGATIVE FEELINGS

When you have negative feelings, write them down on a piece of paper, then hold the paper above a lit candle.
As you watch the flame consume the paper, say to yourself,"goodbye negative feelings"
Then, go to the front door, throw it wide open, and exclaim,"hello positive feelings, come on in!"
If you find there are no positive feelings on your doorstep at that particular moment, scream out loudly, "YOU BASTARDS, YOUR'E SUPPOSED TO BE HERE!"

DEATH

Do not be afraid of death.Death is merely the continuance of life, only without the breathing. Eat lots of spinach.


next......Ecstatic & Depression

ECSTATIC

Experience pure ecstacy by running through a paddock of wild Alpine flowers.
If there isnt a paddock of wild Alpine flowers in your area, try running across your back lawn.
(prolong the ecstacy by running very slowly)

DEPRESSION

Share your depression with other people by giving your depression a name.
You might,for instance, decide to call it Herbert.
Then, when a friend calls you to invite you out for dinner, you should enquire, "can Herbert come too?"
If your friend is non-supportive, just say something like, "I'm sorry, if you cant accept that I'm in a relationship with Herbert, then I really dont want to come to dinner with you"
Another way of dealing with your depression is to give it a less depressing name than Herbert.


next...Urine & Spring Cleaning

i'm beginning to worry about you dennis

Originally Posted by harry

i'm beginning to worry about you dennis

I only write it what about all you guys reading it?