Laughs/Funnies for 2005

**bigbugga** · 14th March 2005, 07:58 AM

WHICH CONDOMS WOULD YOU USE ?

Nike Condoms: Just do it.

Toyota Condoms: Oh what a feeling.

Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby.

Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can't stop.

Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker

Flintstones Vitamins Condom Pack: Ten millon strong and growing.

Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but Ph balanced for a woman.

Macintosh Condoms: It does more, it costs less, its that simple.

Ford Condoms: The best never rest.

Chevy Condoms: Like a rock.

Dial Condoms: Aren't you glad you use it? Don't you wish everybody did?

New York Lotto Condoms: Cause hey-- you never know.

California Lotto Condoms: Who's next?

Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever.

KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good.

Coca Cola Condoms: Always a Real Thing.

Lays Condoms: Betcha can't have just one.

Cambells Soup Condoms: Mm, mm good.

The Carl's Jr. Condom: If it doesn't get all over the place, it doesn't belong in your face...

General Electric: We bring good things to life!

AT&T condom: "Reach out and touch someone."

Bounty: The quicker picker upper.

Microsoft: where do you want to go today ?

Energizer: It keeps going and going and going....

M&M condom: "It melts in your mouth, not in your hands!"

Chevron: use them? people do.

Taco Bell: get some; make a run for the border

MCI: for friends and family Double

Mint

ouble your pleasure, double your fun!

The Sears latex condom: One coat is good for the entire winter

Delta Airlines travel pack: Delta's ready when you are

United Airlines travel pack: Fly United

The Star Trek Condom: To Boldly Go Where No Man Has Gone Before

**VladTepes** · 14th March 2005, 10:50 AM

Land Rover Condom: The best 4 plus 4 by far :!: :wink:

**p38arover** · 14th March 2005, 03:30 PM

Originally posted by Pedro_The_Swift
NON-typical :!:

untypical?

antitypical?

Ron???

Atypical [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif[/img]

Ron

**Pedro_The_Swift** · 14th March 2005, 03:51 PM

8) :wink:

**Yabbie** · 14th March 2005, 08:15 PM

A Fishing Story

A young guy from Missouri moves to Florida and goes to a big everything-under-one-roof" department store looking for a job.
The manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?"
The kid says, "Well, I was a salesman back home in Missouri." The boss liked the kid so he gave him the job.
"You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."
His first day on the job was rough but he got through it. After the store
was locked up, the boss came down to see how he did.
"How many sales did you make today?"
The kid says, "One."
The boss says, "Just one?!! Our sales people average 20 to 30 sales a day!
How much was the sale for? "The kid says,"$101,237.64."
The boss says, "$101,237.64? WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SELL?"
Kid says, "First I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium
fish hook. Then I sold him a larger fish hook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down in the Keys, so I told him he would definitely need a boat. So, we went down to the boat department and I sold him that twin-engine Chris Craft.
Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him
down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition.
The boss said, "So, a guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold
him a BOAT AND A TRUCK??"
The kid replied, "No, he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his wife and I said "Well, your weekend's shot. You might as well go fishing!""

**bigbugga** · 15th March 2005, 07:41 AM

Originally posted by VladTepes
Land Rover Condom: The best 4 plus 4 by far :!: :wink:

Better traction too :wink:

**Pedro_The_Swift** · 15th March 2005, 07:57 AM

Originally posted by bigbugga+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(bigbugga)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-VladTepes
Land Rover Condom: The best 4 plus 4 by far :!: :wink:

Better traction too :wink:[/b][/quote]
dont you mean friction :?:

**bigbugga** · 15th March 2005, 08:02 AM

Originally posted by Pedro_The_Swift+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pedro_The_Swift)</div><div class='quotemain'>

Originally posted by bigbugga@
<!--QuoteBegin-VladTepes

Land Rover Condom: The best 4 plus 4 by far :!: :wink:

Better traction too :wink:

dont you mean friction :?:[/b][/quote]

Traction is what you need in slippery conditions

:wink:

**VladTepes** · 16th March 2005, 12:06 PM

A bloke cruising in his HQ panel van has the luck to pick up good looking girl. He drives her up Mt Coot-tha for a nice view of the city lights to set the mood for some tawdry sex.

Later they are going at it like teenagers when she reaches out of the window, breaks off the radio aerial and starts whipping him with it. Well, he quite likes it and they keep going til they drop in exhaustion.

He drops her off somewhere (all class!) and proceeds to the pub to get ****ed and tell all his mates.

The nest morning he wakes up with no recollection of the previous night, but with some nasty welts all over his back. Some weeping pus.

Worried, he quickly gets himself to the doctor, who, after a brief examination says:

"You've got a particularly nasty case of van aerial disease :!: "

**VladTepes** · 16th March 2005, 12:09 PM

Ivan Milat and a backpacker are walking thorugh Balangalow State Forest.

"Jeez Mr Milat," says the backpacker, "It's dark and creepy in this spooky forest!"

"It's alright for you," says Milat, "I have to walk back alone."

Thread: Laughs/Funnies for 2005

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