<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'>A British company is developing computer chips that store music and play it from implants in women's breasts.
This is a major breakthrough, since women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.[/b][/quote]
LOL!! - I'll actually pay that one VladTepes - even though it is true :roll: !!!
Here is a riddle for the true intellectual. Try to come up with the
answer on your own. The answer is at the end for those who are
unable to think this one through!
At the exact same time, there are two young men on opposite sides
of
the earth: one is walking a tight rope between two skyscrapers; the
other is getting a blow job from an 85 year old woman.
A man staggered into a hospital with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes, and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.
Naturally, the Doctor asked him, "What happened to you?"
"Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a cow pasture.
We went to look for them and while I was looking around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end."
"I walked over, lifted its tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it - stuck right in the middle of the cow's arse."
Still holding the cow's tail up, I yelled to my wife, "Hey, this looks like yours!"
"I don't remember much after that......
(love thses new emotions - lol)
Cheers
Knight
*and a big "Max Walker Style "WELCOME BACK WELCOME BACK!!""
A woman goes into Myers to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday.
She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.
The Myers salesman is standing there, wearing dark shades.
She says, "Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says, "Madam, I'm completely blind; but, if you'll drop on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes."
She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway. He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-lb.Test line. It's a good all around combination, and it's on sale this week for $44."
She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. "Oh, that sounds like a Visa card,"he says.
As the lady bends down to pick up the card, she accidentally farts.
At first she is really embarrassed but then realizes there is no way the blind salesman could tell it was she who had farted.
The salesman rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $58.50 please."
The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me It was on sale for $44. How did you get to $58.50?"
"The Duck Caller is $11 and the Fish Bait is $3.50."
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