Thread: Advice needed...urgently

Originally Posted by spudfan

Back in action, well on parole really.
Well I just returned from exile and, and, and......I don't know how to put this but the first thing I saw when I returned to my kingdom was (and I am faint with trepidation here), the "Sixty Shades of Grey" dvd's sitting by the tv. It gets worse. There was Mrs Spudfan sitting on the sofa and patting the space beside her. Horror of horrors but the aforementioned body work was on full view!!!!! There's more but I just can't bring myself to relate the terrors I have suffered. As a condemned man is allowed one last request, I requested that the lights be turned off and to be allowed to wear gloves. But my request was DENIED. I may never recover from this. I may never be normal again. I just can't relate anymore. If I did and you read it you probably would not be able to sleep.
You can have my kingdom but only if I can return to my tent...

In a far off land, long, long ago.............

In a time gone bye, you would get a pristine model , straight from the show room and whisk it home and keep it forever,
Then it came fashionable to change models on a regular basis, but you blow your dough on the changeover every time
Then it was short term loaners or rentals, but never really satisfactory , and the homestead is always a mess
Now, a lot to be said, become a pedestrian, glance in the show room window as you wander past, but keep your wallet securely hidden, and keep walking.