Thread: Jokes

81583039_2485835881545616_2936910830416953344_n.jpg

What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it?


Short.

Originally Posted by sashadidi

Attachment 157466

What do you call a Greek bloke who jumps out of plane??

Con descending.

A woman told me people who eat meat are gross.
I replied that someone who sells fruit and vegetables is grocer.

There once was a Red Indian who had only one testicle, and whose given name was 'Onestone'.
He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone.
After years and years of torment, Onestone finally cracked and said,'
If anyone calls me Onestone again I will kill them!'


The word got around and nobody called him that any more.
Then one day a young woman named Blue Bird forgot and said, 'Good morning, Onestone.'
He jumped up, grabbed her and took her deep into the forest where he made love to her all day and all night.
He made love to her all the next day, until Blue Bird died from exhaustion.
The word got around that Onestone meant what he promised he would do.


Years went by and no one dared call him by his given name until a woman named Yellow Bird returned to the village after being away.


Yellow Bird, who was Blue Bird's cousin, was overjoyed when she saw Onestone.
She hugged him and said, 'Good to see you, Onestone.'
Onestone grabbed her, took her deep into the forest, made love to her all day, made love to her all night, made love to her all the next day,
Made love to her all the next night, but Yellow Bird wouldn't die!


You can't kill Two Birds with OneStone.

Yep, I'll pay that one Eevo.

My pet Budgie broke his leg yesterday, so I made him a splint out of matchsticks.


You should have seen his little face light up when he tried to walk.

50532326_2049560458465870_6986125492218757120_n.jpg