Thread: Bad intro into this website...

I find this forum to be happy go lucky with no tension, ask any question no matter how stupid, should try that with Marine Aquarium forums now there up tight

Leave things the way they are its bad enough everything in life having to be ruled and governed

If you don’t like it don’t read

Originally Posted by Captain_Rightfoot

Ok, this is normally my fire story but it probably has some application here.

Wind things back to me being 17. I've just picked up my first car about 5pm. So I go out to show some friends. All is good. I head home about 11pm.

So, where I live is a bit rural and there isn't street lighting. I come over a slight rise about a K from my place and as my lights come down into the next dip I see some rubbish. No worries I think straight over the top. As I get closer the rubbish puts it's head up

It was to late to do anything Clunk from under the car. I get out and have a look at my spoiler (sorry...car only 6 hours old). I then go back to see what it was I hit. It was pretty dark but I could see it was a cutsy kitten . So, what to do.

I saw a light in in a adjacent house (remember it's after 11pm by this stage). I decide to do the right thing so I go up and knock on the door. This guy comes out in his dressing gown and slippers and I tell him that I think I've killed his cat. He wants to go out and have a look so off we trod. As we approach the deceased he just walks straight up to it and picks it up. He shakes his head and we start walking back to his place. As I start to apologise he says "don't worry about it - you've done all you can mate".

What happens next surprises me a bit. Without warning he swings this tiny dead kitten into this huge arc through the air and lands it in the neighbours yard. He then says "It's the neighbours cat anyway...goodnight".

So I go off home saddened but happy that I had at least attempted to do the right thing. Anyway weeks go by. During a over the fence chat a neighbour recounts the story about how one of their child's friends has been traumatised by someone who killed their kitten and then callously placed it on their front path

I guess the moral of this story is that if you find your dead pet seemingly callously abandoned there may be more of a story to it than you think

That had to be the most inappropriate story I’ve ever heard,

but cant stop laughing at inappropriateness

When I was a wee lad we were travelling the inland road to NSW.
Crested a hill and hit what we thought was a rabbit.
Looked behind and it was still twitching, so we turned around.

Went and checked it out and it wasn't dead, but not in good shape.
I said to my brother, we'll have to kill it.
He said, nah hang on a sec...went to the glovebox of the car, pulled out an aerosol can and came back.

Unbelievably....he sprayed it all over this thing, and no joke......

It got up and bounded away in the bush.

I said "What's in the can"

He said...........















HAIR RESTORER

Originally Posted by Numpty's Missus

One of my favourite jokes Feenie

Ah a purveyor of good taste ye are

Originally Posted by Numpty's Missus

In the version I heard the rabbit kept looking back and waving....

In the can was "hair restorer with a permanent wave!!"

lol love it

My friend was training to be a magician once and I asked him if he could pull a rabbit of his hat.
He said he no, but if he wanted me too, he could pull a hair out of his ass

Originally Posted by LandyAndy

Pencil case
My favourite was the pencil sharpener
Andrew

har har har. Yeah, same with me

The best kind of ferral cat is a dead one.

On the other hand, I heard a DoC (Dept. of Conservation) guy talking on the National radio about how they had eradicated all the pests from an offshore island here, to protect the Black Robin or something. They were congratulating themselves about a successful eradication programme when someone asked how long the cats had been there - "oh about 100-120 years" came the answer. Then in stunned silence they all looked at each other with the dawning realisation that they'd just eradicated a whole unique species. Didn't make the papers that one.