Embarrassment

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Originally Posted by V8Ian

Stop thinking negative and just be the best person you can be. Trust takes time, but will slowly be built, sneaking up so that one day it will be there 100%. You have enough real problems to deal with, without creating troubles that are not there, or just may happen. Every one has recognised the enormous effort you have put in, keep trying mate, you are moving forward. You have people all over the world (literally) wanting to see a happy result. I know sometimes it feels like you're driving through mud on H/Ts, 50 kph on the speedo but only doing 5kph, but it's still moving. I have faith in you Jason.

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Mate, focus on the real problems; you're wasting time on imagined and percieved problems, time that could be spent on actual problems. Karen has been honest about her feelings, she won't stop being so with the neighbour or anyone else. C'mon Jason, pick yourself up by the bootstraps and chip away at the real problem, we know you can do it, you know you can do it, no one believes it will be simple though.

You said you enjoyed last week, that's only the beginning mate.

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Originally Posted by V8Ian

I think this is very apt Jason. :)

Bear Attack in Churchill, Manitoba, Canada..

These are pictures of an actual polar bear attack.

The pictures were taken while people watched and
Could do nothing to stop the attack!

Reports from the local newspaper say that
The victim will make a full recovery.


The photos are below.







May your troubles always be smaller than
you imagine!!

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I really like this one and am going to e-mail it to friends who are not forum members. Its a valuable lesson for all of us, Johnf.

Well i went out on my own again & got the pamphlets & took a DVD back then came home & we folded the pamphlets & got them delivered aswell...

Yes i am have trouble with the feelings isue as Karen has been my everything for the last 23 years the only thing the poor woman hasn't had to do is whipe me ****ing ass... ...You don't think how much i like knowing what i have done in the past everything i am i owe it to Karen fully...
Now when someone tryes to chat Karen up i **** i know that anyone else could & can offer her compered to what i do what i am ..Completely normal men have so much to offer her & it frightens me to death .And i want so much better for her & the kids (normality) ..

I will get over it & i will deal with it . And i will learn to let her go for her days out & to the gym . Because i want to make her happy .. I will be ok tomorrow after her tattoo & Karen will come home & tell me everything what was said & what they chated about as thats what Karen does & i love to listen to her stories of what went on i always have cause i love to see her excited , Happy & laughing while she tells me ..she is worried about tomorrow as well cause she tells me she feels like an idiot & very embarrest about it .....


AND I MOST OF ALL KNOW KAREN CHOSE ME OVER ANYONE ELSE SO I WILL BE OK & I WILL BE SUCKING IT UP TO SEE HER HAPPY ..

Karen know what i'm like & will work through it with me so i don't make her cry anymore & i want her to have her time with friends & at the gym ..

Use can help me with that & take my mind off such things ...

AUS i will get to your place by myself oneday its just i wont be able to stay for awhile but once i have done it a few times it will get better & i mite even stay for a cuppa of tea not your coffee crap . . . ..

Karen has told me she doesn't want to try anymore & she isn't strong enough to go through it again & it kills me to hear it..

I love Karens company & to just chat with her & i cant she doesn't want it .

she wants to be left alone so i'm sitting here listening to music on my phone so as i leave her alone , its hard to watch her & the kids laughing & not be able to join in & make her laugh....

I relie on karen to much & i know this is all my fault & i want to fix it properly & make her happy . . ..
I don't want to go back to my mothers cause i can't even go for a shower with out her walking in theres no privacy what so ever plus worse crap ..
I don't want to go back go back to my Fathers & be in his incest crap & i would be pushed so hard to get out & work & then he they would take it anyway . .
So my othe i'm going to try my guts out to fix this for Karen & the kids although the kids still drive us mad at the moment....
I would just love to sit & chat with Karen about anything or anyone . neither of us have anyone to talk to so i just spill on here but poor Karen has no one except Vickie but she is my cousin & Karens best friend so she feels bad for both of us & doesn't want to interfeer....

And i probably shouldn't post up so much but hey i gotta get it out of my head someway....

I can't cheer Karen up anyway which is bad cause we used to laugh & muck around together & kills me that i can't help but to make her cry i want to make her smile & laugh....

My mother called in today as she does every monday before she goes ten pin bowling & all she was worried about was getting freezer from aldi & how she would get it into the car.. Completely not interested in our struggles & she thinks if i go back to her place she can get the careres pension to look after me but she wont do anything for me at all she's all about the money..

I miss my lovely Karen very much ...

So, tell me again why you're thinking about going back to your parents' places?
Stop thinking like a victim. You're not a victim - you're in charge of your life.
Just focus on the best of the present and making it even better.

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Originally Posted by banjo

Well i went out on my own again & got the pamphlets & took a DVD back then came home & we folded the pamphlets & got them delivered aswell...

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Excellent

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Originally Posted by banjo

Yes i am have trouble with the feelings issue as Karen has been my everything for the last 23 years the only thing the poor woman hasn't had to do is whipe me ****ing ass... ......

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Maybe she didn't, but she's been there for 23 years so you must be doing something right!

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Originally Posted by banjo

Now when someone tryes to chat Karen up i **** i know that anyone else could & can offer her compared to what i do what i am

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George Cloony I'm not and I doubt too many of us here are...so you're in no different position then the rest of us in this respect.

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Originally Posted by banjo

Completely normal men have so much to offer her & it frightens me to death .And i want so much better for her & the kids (normality) ..

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Define normal please. By Normal you mean those without anxiety problems. So drunks, wife beaters, cheaters, gamblers, workaholics, etc are ok? Mate, we "normal" blokes all have our problems.

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Originally Posted by banjo

AND I MOST OF ALL KNOW KAREN CHOSE ME OVER ANYONE ELSE SO I WILL BE OK & I WILL BE SUCKING IT UP TO SEE HER HAPPY ..

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Now you're talking. That's what we (Men, husbands) all do:D

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Originally Posted by banjo

I miss my lovely Karen very much ...

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So keep trying....

She's allowed to crack every now and again. Everyone does...it's good for the soul.

Ain't that the truth White. :angel:

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Originally Posted by DiscoMick

So, tell me again why you're thinking about going back to your parents' places?
Stop thinking like a victim. You're not a victim - you're in charge of your life.
Just focus on the best of the present and making it even better.

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Yeah Banj, I agree with DiscoMick how did "going back to your mother" come into the equation. No way would I want to go back to my parents at 38 years of age thats for sure.
Can I say this, you have Karen locked in Golden Cage up on this pedestal, which I might add increases pressure on her, nobody likes to feel trapped in a cage. You can show your love by opening the door of that cage and letting her have her personal space. That would be the best present you can give her. You are starting to think in that direction, I can see by your postings, but man GIVE HER SOME PERSONAL SPACE!!!:):D

Well Karen got a call from the tattoo shop this morning about 10.30 to say they had a cancelation & she could come down now, So she did she felt a little uncomfortable about going there but the guy made her feel at ease & was real good to her cause she was very embarrest & nervouse but all good , She hasn't booked in for another one yet but will much latter when we find one for her that we both like:D ......

So i went out on my own again i went & got our papers & came back home & started to fold & bag them , Had most of them done before Karen got home just a few to bag .So we had lunch & finished them off .Then Karen went & picked up the spogs from school..

I am just having a cuppa then i will go load them all into her car so we can deliver them in the morning..I also have to check my car as the roof is leaking & its dripping onto my overhead consol which is just covered MDF if its still a bit bad i will have to move it back into the yard where it sits fairly level....:mad:...

Me i'm fine about today was even happier to hear that Karen hasn't booked in yet so we can find one we both like.....

Hey Banj, I was up at Charlestown today and I had half an hour to kill, so I wandered into the library up there. Guess what, they have a Haynes manual on the Series 1 on the shelf, a bit dog eared and looking worse for wear, but I couldn't believe it. No other model Landy repair manuals though. plenty for the Jap crap!!!!:):)

Good to hear jason...keep up the good work and stay positive;)

Mrs hh:angel: