I am the eldest so i got it all . . . .
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Thanks Banjo, having been onboard since the start of the thread I think most of it you have shared in bits and pieces before.
I once heard the term 'unblocking the drains' in a relationship. If a drain is blocked when it rains the water goes everywhere and causes a mess.
In a relationship/marriage if the drains are blocked then there is a mess too. You and Karen have started to unblock the drains and I know you realise there has been a lot that has clogged them up over the years.
Being the loving fella that you are, please allow Karen the opportunity to unblock the drain by telling her side of the story - no matter how hard that is for you. Allowing her to do that without saying things back at her - will show her that you are trustworthy.
I hope that that will help her to find her trust in you again. Remember this ain't no grease and oil change - this is a major service and repair job you two are going through so it will take a while.
Hang in there mate - and all the best to Karen too. :)
Pretty much as Jim said Jason, you can't change the past, it gone. But at the moment your getting in front of yourself, your currant mission is to get Karen well enough to make proper decisions. In the meantime, keep doing as much as you can for Karen, without suffocating her and pretend you two have just met, and you fancy her a bit. Take her to the beach for a picnic, or fish and chip lunch. Court her and treat her with respect.
I remember years ago when I was about 19 my best mate took his newish girlfriend out for a meal. They were both dressed to the hilt, he then drove down to a beach about 5km away, proptly pulled out a hamper with macdonalds and a bottle of red. She raved about that dinner for years later claiming it was the most thoughtful date she ever had. Dosnt cost money
cheers
blaze
The mind is a funny thing & it can break at times i of all know this..
When Karen had told me or after she told me some things came back . .
I remember seeing the oldman throw a frying pan of hot oil over the oldgirl . .
We where going out oneday when i was young & i had these shorts stubby brand short little green things & i noticed some schools have them as uniforms..Anyway everyone was ready & i was having trouble gettin these shorts on & the oldman being himself desided to help by grabbing me by the sides of the shorts & picking me up & shaking me till they fit on ..I remember that well cause thats the time my left testical split in 2 . HAHA i have 3 . . .
My parents for some reason kept gladbags of paper under the house & me being me found some matches & was happily lighting the plastic bags watching them melt , I didn't realise that the paper would catch fire , Well i burnt the whole floor boards out of the back of the house had all the services there police fire ambo's i thought it was xmas.. When they all went i was kicked & hit from 1 end of the house to the other a few times...
:D:eek::p:mad::(