Threads that go off topic - here and other forums.

[JDNSW]

****ing land rovers why are they such a bloody pain in the arse to work on.
****ing **** head useless **** designers!
....

What were you trying to do?

John

[carlschmid2002]

Did Ford own Landrover in the D2 days?
I had to change the headlight bulb in the Fairlane yesterday, a simple procedure one might well believe. This is how it went.
1. Lift bonnet and survey the task.
2. Attempt to unplug U/S globe with finger tips as the battery is jammed in behind the light assembly.
3. Fail, decide to remove battery.
4. As the clock, radio et al are all power dependant, use jump leads to maintain connectivity (a mission in itself).
5. Remove battery box.
6. Try to pull the plug off the back of the globe.
7-12. Repeat the previous step half a dozen times, increasing force and blood pressure each time.
13. Feel around for a button or lever that could lock plug on. Find nothing.
14. Get a torch, stand on your head on the battery tray, look for a button or lever that could lock plug on. Find nothing.
15. Repeat steps 7-12.
16. Consult You Tube for a "How to" tutorial, noting that the video maker states the plug simply pulls off.
17. Repeat 7-12.
18. Watch You Tube again.
19. Repeat 7-12.
20. Peel back rubber weatherproof boot from bulb so the plug can be removed without destroying the inards of the sealed headlight assembly.
21. Get a torch, stand on your head on the battery tray to see how to undo the globe retaining clip.
22. Discover the bulb cannot be manoeuvred through the retaining clip.
23. Using an electrical screwdriver, brute force and ignorance lever the the bulb from the plug. Note two pins will release easily but the last one will require significantly more brute force.
24. Trip over battery, disconnecting same.
24A. (Optional) Swear profusely, throw all tools within reach and generally chuck a tantrum.
24B. (If 24A was enacted) Retrieve all tool and apologise to neighbours.
25. Insert the new bulb into the headlight assembly and engage the retaining clip noting that steps 6, 7-12, 15, 17 and 19 have distorted the retaining clip so the globe flops around in the light assembly like a cock in a sock.
26. Remove globe and using only finger tips bend the retaining clip the best way you can in order that it will retain the globe firmly.
27. Repeat step 26 as many times as necessary.
28. Insert the new bulb into the headlight assembly and engage the retaining clip noting that only one side of the clip can now be engaged into the lock.
29. Re-instal the rubber weatherproof boot making sure it catches on each or the three pins seperately at least twice.
30. Before reconnecting the plug rotate it 180* and note the miniture recessed button that disengages the plug lock. This button is impossible for the average adult male finger tip to detect. Curse the design engineer. Rotate the plug back 180* and push firmly onto the back of the bulb.
31. Replace the battery box.
32. Replace the Battery.
33. Reconnect the battery.
34. Confirm that the memories for radio, seat and mirror preferences are lost and the clock is displaying the wrong time.

I hope that anyone contemplating the same repair as I have described can benefit from my experience using the 34 simple steps above. If you are in a hurry steps 24A & B can be skipped saving 15-30 minutes.
Anyone competent at timing Road Ranger gearboxes or lapping and setting up differentials should have the skills to perform this repair following these instructions.

But the Cowboys won and all is right in the world.

[V8Ian]

But the Cowboys won and all is right in the world.

It will be if they win the next two games.

[Toxic_Avenger]

Ian,
Keep a small mirror in the tool box. Works wonders, and will save you having to stand on your head in the engine bay (or getting grease on the bald patch, if applicable)

[Disco Muppet]

What were you trying to do?

John

I was swapping my accelerator pedal assembly, and installing my Engine Saver low coolant alarm.

The process goes something like this:

Accelerator pedal:

1. Undo three trim plugs from plastic tray
2. Remove tray and place on centre console, where it will fall on your head.
3. Twist self into bonsai plant type position to remove accelerator potentiometer plug.
4. Remember you need a screw driver for step 3. Untwist self and fetch screw driver
5. Re-twist and lever plug out.
6. Look at bolts and ask Land Rover gods "how the roofbars am I going to get those out"
7. Consult JC and Tombie.
8. Fetch appropriate ratchet and wobble drive, along with extensions and 13mm socket.
9. Find pieces of wobble drive after it falls apart. Pray it stays together.
10. Undo bolts, remark how easy that was.
11. Look at plastic clip and repeat step 6.
12. Break clip on advice from experts.
13. Detach clips from pedal assembly, attempt to remove.
14. Realise loom is in the way. Attempt to move out of the way.
15. Swear.
16. While attempting to move loom, accidentally re-insert plastic clip.
17. Attempt to bop plastic clip out, gouge thumb on sharp corner of bracket.
18. Swear loudly and curse yourself for not buying a Perentie.
19. Suck thumb and find band aid in first aid kit you keep in the car.
20. Place crap band aid on, which fails to stick due to grease, dust, and oil.
21. Secure band aid with duct tape.
22. More swearing.
23. Go inside and have a drink and something to eat, as well as a lie down so you don't pass out from blood loss and shock.
24. Find inner zen.
25. Go back to car
26. Realise that you can wiggle the bracket out of the way of the loom by moving it to the side.
27. Remove pedal.
28. Avoid temptation to gloat as this isn't the zen way.
29. Refit other pedal in 5 minutes now that you've worked it out.

[V8Ian]

I was swapping my accelerator pedal assembly, and installing my Engine Saver low coolant alarm.

The process goes something like this:

Accelerator pedal:

1. Undo three trim plugs from plastic tray
2. Remove tray and place on centre console, where it will fall on your head.
3. Twist self into bonsai plant type position to remove accelerator potentiometer plug.
4. Remember you need a screw driver for step 3. Untwist self and fetch screw driver
5. Re-twist and lever plug out.
6. Look at bolts and ask Land Rover gods "how the roofbars am I going to get those out"
7. Consult JC and Tombie.
8. Fetch appropriate ratchet and wobble drive, along with extensions and 13mm socket.
9. Find pieces of wobble drive after it falls apart. Pray it stays together.
10. Undo bolts, remark how easy that was.
11. Look at plastic clip and repeat step 6.
12. Break clip on advice from experts.
13. Detach clips from pedal assembly, attempt to remove.
14. Realise loom is in the way. Attempt to move out of the way.
15. Swear.
16. While attempting to move loom, accidentally re-insert plastic clip.
17. Attempt to bop plastic clip out, gouge thumb on sharp corner of bracket.
18. Swear loudly and curse yourself for not buying a Perentie.
19. Suck thumb and find band aid in first aid kit you keep in the car.
20. Place crap band aid on, which fails to stick due to grease, dust, and oil.
21. Secure band aid with duct tape.
22. More swearing.
23. Go inside and have a drink and something to eat, as well as a lie down so you don't pass out from blood loss and shock.
24. Find inner zen.
25. Go back to car
26. Realise that you can wiggle the bracket out of the way of the loom by moving it to the side.
27. Remove pedal.
28. Avoid temptation to gloat as this isn't the zen way.
29. Refit other pedal in 5 minutes now that you've worked it out.

Pffft, a walk in the park, a mere 29 steps.

[scarry]

I had to help an arborist cut down four 25m high large fig trees surrounding our carport.
the process went like this.
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19

Then hand out copious amounts of cash?

Didn't mind as a lot cheaper than the local tree loppers and not one piece of tree landed on the carport

The clean up is a work in progress..

[cuppabillytea]

Did Ford own Landrover in the D2 days?
I had to change the headlight bulb in the Fairlane yesterday, a simple procedure one might well believe. This is how it went.
1. Lift bonnet and survey the task.
2. Attempt to unplug U/S globe with finger tips as the battery is jammed in behind the light assembly.
3. Fail, decide to remove battery.
4. As the clock, radio et al are all power dependant, use jump leads to maintain connectivity (a mission in itself).
5. Remove battery box.
6. Try to pull the plug off the back of the globe.
7-12. Repeat the previous step half a dozen times, increasing force and blood pressure each time.
13. Feel around for a button or lever that could lock plug on. Find nothing.
14. Get a torch, stand on your head on the battery tray, look for a button or lever that could lock plug on. Find nothing.
15. Repeat steps 7-12.
16. Consult You Tube for a "How to" tutorial, noting that the video maker states the plug simply pulls off.
17. Repeat 7-12.
18. Watch You Tube again.
19. Repeat 7-12.
20. Peel back rubber weatherproof boot from bulb so the plug can be removed without destroying the inards of the sealed headlight assembly.
21. Get a torch, stand on your head on the battery tray to see how to undo the globe retaining clip.
22. Discover the bulb cannot be manoeuvred through the retaining clip.
23. Using an electrical screwdriver, brute force and ignorance lever the the bulb from the plug. Note two pins will release easily but the last one will require significantly more brute force.
24. Trip over battery, disconnecting same.
24A. (Optional) Swear profusely, throw all tools within reach and generally chuck a tantrum.
24B. (If 24A was enacted) Retrieve all tool and apologise to neighbours.
25. Insert the new bulb into the headlight assembly and engage the retaining clip noting that steps 6, 7-12, 15, 17 and 19 have distorted the retaining clip so the globe flops around in the light assembly like a cock in a sock.
26. Remove globe and using only finger tips bend the retaining clip the best way you can in order that it will retain the globe firmly.
27. Repeat step 26 as many times as necessary.
28. Insert the new bulb into the headlight assembly and engage the retaining clip noting that only one side of the clip can now be engaged into the lock.
29. Re-instal the rubber weatherproof boot making sure it catches on each or the three pins seperately at least twice.
30. Before reconnecting the plug rotate it 180* and note the miniture recessed button that disengages the plug lock. This button is impossible for the average adult male finger tip to detect. Curse the design engineer. Rotate the plug back 180* and push firmly onto the back of the bulb.
31. Replace the battery box.
32. Replace the Battery.
33. Reconnect the battery.
34. Confirm that the memories for radio, seat and mirror preferences are lost and the clock is displaying the wrong time.

I hope that anyone contemplating the same repair as I have described can benefit from my experience using the 34 simple steps above. If you are in a hurry steps 24A & B can be skipped saving 15-30 minutes.
Anyone competent at timing Road Ranger gearboxes or lapping and setting up differentials should have the skills to perform this repair following these instructions.

I can confirm that that is the correct procedure, as it is exactly as I have performed the same task on an EL Falcon and a Territory many times.
Cheers, Billy.

[Toxic_Avenger]

Stick with it... Interesting

[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCn8zs912OE[/ame]

[Homestar]

Stick with it... Interesting

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCn8zs912OE

Yep, watched it this morning. . Vsauce (1, 2 and 3) are my favourite YouTube channels.