Jokes

Instructions on how to fall down stairs:
Step 1
Step 2
Step 5
Step 12

I skipped Steps: 1, 2, & 5 and broke my arm. That's what you call falling down stares.

Our son did it backwards when step two broke - and went to hospital. Does that earn extra points?

Well I am going to repeat a joke one of Billy's brothers told over a beer on Friday. Ties in with the recent anniversary of Princess Di's death.

dodi scolding his driver in the hereafter: "I said I want to **** Di in the tunnel, not ****en die in the tunnel!"

I once dated a girl who had a twin.

People always asked me how did I tell them apart.
I always said it was simple- Rebecca always painted her nails purple and Christopher had a cock.

2 fat ladies walk into a bar, and and with a thick accent, place their drink order with the bartender.
"You two ladies from Ireland?" asks the bartender, making small-talk.
Offended, one of them replies "Wales!"
"Oh I'm so sorry," says the bartender, "Are you two whales from Ireland?"

What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face before.

Watch out!!! There are Dutchmen.

Mod hat on. :spudnikhattip:
Of late some of the posts in this thread have become somewhat coarse. Please remember that this is a "G" Rated forum, and post accordingly; if it's not suitable for your daughter, wife, sister or gran, it's not suitable here.

To make it G rated.

Two guys walked into a bar. You'd think the second one would've ducked.


Sorry I couldn't resist.

Nathan.