Thread: Jokes

http://scontent.flhr3-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/22886293_1271754269597868_5629547457742359651_n.jp g?oh=10fac4b477a566f5c029f159f52eed65&oe=5AA8B2C3

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb??

2, but you have to wonder how they got in there.

A man, cleaning out the attic of a deceased estate, finds a lamp. He rubs it, and a genie pops out.
The genie tells the man he will grant him one wish for setting him free. Thinking for a moment, the man says " I love driving my land rover... I love it more than life itself, and would love to travel across the entire world in my Landy, but I'm absolutely terrified of boats. Can you make a massive highway that connects the whole world together, so I can drive everywhere?"
The genie explains that while he is magic, he cannot grant him a wish of that magnitude, and asked the man to pick another wish.
The man says "well, I also love reading AULRO, but the newbs always ask the same old question without searching first. Can you get them to use the search button before asking a silly question?"
The genie carefully ponders his response "So... was that a two lane, or four lane highway?"

CAN THE ADMINS OF THIS FORUM DO A BETTER JOB OF MONITORING WHO IS ALLOWED ON HERE PLEASE.
WE HAVE A NEW MEMBER, AN ELDERY LADY SHE HAS BEEN PRIVATELY MESSAGING MEMBERS SENDING US NAKED PICTURES OF HER SELF IN SEDUCTIVE POSES ALONG WITH CLOSEUPS OF HER LADY BITS.
SHE IS OFFERING A IPHONE 8+ IN EXCHANGE FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS.
I AM ESPECIALLY BOTHERED BECAUSE IT TURNED OUT TO BE A IPHONE 5S AND OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH IT BECAUSE IT IS SUPER SLOW AND THE CAP LOCKS ARE STUCK ON.




Sent from my iPhone

Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar.
You can’t tell me that THAT'S just a coincidence!

You gotta like this no matter what your political views.

Yes Bob, I love those little blue squares. Although,,, I thing I prefer red.