Thread: Marriage course

Originally Posted by WingsOfToa

Just to throw in a light hearted answer: If she complains about the dunny seat up, do it in the sink...
Cheers,
Mik

Wait till she's finished doing the dishes though.

It seems to me any advice given in this kind of thing is based on a whole lot of assumptions? even one-on-ones are only as good as the councillor/therapist/con-artist ...

Speak to each other, communication is way under-rated! If both parties are willing to talk that's where the answers lie IMHO

Originally Posted by Cobber

It seems to me any advice given in this kind of thing is based on a whole lot of assumptions? even one-on-ones are only as good as the councillor/therapist/con-artist ...

Speak to each other, communication is way under-rated! If both parties are willing to talk that's where the answers lie IMHO

I totally agree about the talking and we do often, I feel at the moment though many confused messages. Last week it was you dont cycle with me on a saturday, this week its ok, you can go a ride with you mate, I shall meet the others as normal. confused messages.

[quote=dobbo;1967440]

Why can't they invent something for us to marry instead of women?

--FRED FLINTSTONE/QUOTE]


enough said.

The way things are going , you soon will " Another Man "cheers jimr1.

Originally Posted by Cobber

Speak to each other, communication is way under-rated! If both parties are willing to talk that's where the answers lie IMHO

^ This.

Originally Posted by Disco Muppet

^ This.

x2.

Communication can feel like banging your head against an engine block at times.

One of the most helpful things I learnt on a course was to do with communication - specifically stonewalling.

When someone stonewalls ie, goes silent, don't relate, don't make eye contact, its actually a normal psychological reaction to being emotionally overloaded.
BUT...and here's the critical lesson.... to the person who isn't stonewalling - it looks like the stonewaller is just being difficult, refusing to talk, or doesn't care anymore. So...the non-stonewaller gets angry...which then adds to the emotional loading on the stonewaller making things worse.

When I did something to upset my wife it used to take 2 hours for her to talk to me. Most of that was because I kept trying to get her to talk - I made it worse.
Finally learnt the stonewalling thing, now I shut up and wait. Once she's figured out how she feels and why she tells me - usually in a calm voice and we go from there.

Originally Posted by carjunkieanon

When I did something to upset my wife it used to take 2 hours for her to talk to me.

2 hours...

Mine takes up to 2 days....

It's blissfully quiet

Originally Posted by Tombie

2 hours...

Mine takes up to 2 days....

It's blissfully quiet

Isn't it always quiet in the desert Mike?