Thread: The book, An introduction

Agreed Dave. My local BSC had one as part of a promotion - stuffed full of Loctite or similar. Not a beer to be seen.

No beer how disappointing.

Over heard when I was having a good moment having been told to "go sort out a problem"

"Farey's smiling"
"Yep"
"other guys not looking so happy"
"he's having a Coyote moment"
"?"
"He knows its already going badly wrong and has just realised that the anvil is still up there"
"Why's Farey Smiling then"
"last thing I heard was, Hang on chaps, I've got an idea"
"so hes got a plan?"
"not really sure, I asked him and I quote "plan? there Aint no plan" laughed and got to work "
"coffee?"
"yeah, this could be entertaining"

yes, I know, no, there is no requirement for you to tell me that "If you'd killed her when you first met you'd be out by now" I am fully utterly and completely aware of this fact And after yesterdays events I'm kinda contemplating that 15 years on the inside is almost a wholey acceptable deal.

Wibbley flashback fade with harpy music to me riding home from work on my pushbike here, music cross fades to a repeatedly ringing mobile phone....

"no sweety, I'm riding my bike home, I cant just grab the phone on the first ring because I have to stop the bike, get pack off of my back, dig out the phone then answer it, it doesnt help when you stop ringing as soon as I get the phone out of my bag then dont answer the phone when I call you back.... whats wrong............ No, I havent checked my sms's I'm riding home checking the sms's would require me to stop the bike....... no I think this is the perfect time to be sarcastic...... OK so you've locked your car keys in the car and your at PCYC can I bring the spares? Ok."

15 minutes later....

"honey, How am I supposed to get into the house? my house keys are in my car and my car is locked, where are my car keys?..... In the house, I see, 2 questions, Why is my car locked and why are my car keys in the house?... oh you didnt put them there... OK......."

20 minutes later....

"Ok sweetie, Ive broken into the house, got my car keys, broken out of the house (we have deadlocks) got my house keys but I couldnt find your spare car keys, where are you spare car keys?..... in the house, On the same keyring as the spare house keys....... Really, you couldn't have told me that before I had to break into the house and then back out again, more to the point, why are the spare house keys INSIDE the house? ahh because they're on the spare car keys and you took them inside when you had to unlock the car and couldnt find your car keys.... naturally...."

so once thats delt with its off to the shopping....

Alex in tow and I'm into aldi to get some more of the "chips Im not going to name incase you guys work out how addictive they are and buy up the leftovers" and I grab a handfull of packs, alex grabs a couple and when I ask him what hes doing he tells me getting some of the chips, as many as he can carry...Being helpful I suggest that he might be able to carry more if he goes and gets a box. Now I'd seen a small box that might have held 4 packs of the chips about 10 feet away, Alex was off... 2 minutes, 3 minutes 4 minutes and I'm getting ready to wind up the boomy voice.

I spot alex on the way back dragging a box Its bigger than him A cardboard box thats 3 feet by 2 foot by 18inches if its an inch. Alright little man, Challange accepted. I put my fist full of chip bags back on the shelf. "you can get as many bags of chips as you can put into the box and then carry the box back to the checkout conveyor" Havent even finished setting the rules and hes loading the box "sure dad".... Funny I'm sure some one somewhere has said, check this out, and that SWMBO had she been there would have said your just like your father and had dad been there he probably would have said something like "hehehehehe, now your going to get to know how I felt all those times"..

Alex has stopped putting chips into the box, "Is that all, dont think you can get any more in?"

"none left dad"

Ahhh crap, hes got every single bag out of the shelves into the box, no way he can carry that back to the checkout, bueaty hes dragging it.

"uh ah buddy, no dragging you've got to carry it"
"ohhh..."

No word of a lie he tried, for about 2 minutes to pick that box up before he realised if he lifted up the far end he couldnt move his arms to pick up the close end, if he picked up the close end he couldnt reach the far end.

Nice, I'm getting out of here with just the 4 packets I was goi..ng .....t......o.....g...e......t. No way....less than 2 minutes and Hes worked out that if he lifts the far end of the box up against the shelves it'll stay up, damnit I can see those gears working in there, the boilers getting up a head of steam...... yep, lift the close side, its falling, jam a leg under, walk the box up to his hip, deform the box so the top closes, reach over and

"No problem Dad"......


13 packets of chips on the conveyor a dozen spectators and no more help than a suggestion from dad and a heavy application of sarcasm..

I'm so proud.

Swmbo spent most of the evening finding bags of chips that had been hidden away, just because of the cheek of her calling me and asking how long it takes to go and buy some chips and to walk through aldi. Of course I may not have given her the whole picture when I told her, "well you know how it is when Alex decides he wants to help out, we're just going through the checkout."

What chips are they?

Were...

very nice ones

now thats how kids learn to be resourceful.....

So here I am in the middle of U Secret-Squirrel of A....

The briefing to me by the boss of the place when he found out I was the GSE monkey.

"If you need it, and you find it and you can start it, you can have it"

about half the day later and he spots one of his Bombloaders running around.

"whered you get that?"

"over there....." (point in some ague direction)

"But that hasnt started in years, howd you get it to go?"

"Sprinkled farey dust on it"

"But its broken"

"aint now, its running and you said"

"If you can find it and you can start it you can have it, fair enough"

"You're serious about that?"

"Yep, you see it and can make it go its yours..."

Not sure he realizes what hes let himself in for because hes said we can also grab a vehicle for a section vehicle, I found this..... (and some other far more exotic trucks too..