Thread: Jokes

Sorry, but I need to vent !!!!

I experienced the WORST customer service last night at a shop near me, I don't want to mention the name of the store because I'm not in the habit of publicly trashing people or business' (Even if they DO deserve it).

Thursday afternoon I bought something from this store. I paid cash for it. I took it home and found out it didn't work. So last night less than 24 hours later I took it back to the shop and asked if I could get a refund. The girl in the shop told me NO even though I still had the receipt. I asked if I could get a FREE replacement instead then.

Again this person told me "NO." I asked to talk to a manager now as I’m really not happy and I explained that I had just bought the item had got it home and it didn't work. The manager just smiled and told me to my face that I was "OUT OF LUCK." No refund. No FREE replacement. Grrrrrrrrr.

I'll tell you what...I am NEVER buying a lottery ticket from them again.

Student joke
Did you hear about the bloke who told a joke to a gardener, who nearly wet his plants?
Ka boom!

I met a Swahili girl on a dating site. We met up and talked for hours.
We just clicked.

are dad jokes allowed?

A 13 year old weasel walks into a bar and approaches the counter. The bartender immediately notices the underage weasel. "Sir, you look extremely young. I can't serve you even a single beer". "Oh c'mon. You can't just slide me one?" "Can't and will not serve to anyone under age". "Fine. Well what other things do you have?" "Well for non-alcoholic drinks I have tap water and bottled water, I have coffee, and I have pop. Which would you like?" "Pop" goes the weasel.

I was trying to work out the ratio of promiscuous to non-promiscous women at a party. It stumped me, so I asked my friend Horatio.

Ethel checked into a Motel on her 65th Birthday, she was lonely, a little depressed at her advancing age so decided to risk an adventure.
She thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sensual massages."
She looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a guy calling himself Tender Tony a very handsome man with assorted physical skills flexing in the photo. He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, long powerful legs, dazzling smile, six pack abs and she felt quite certain she could bounce a dime off his well-oiled buns.
She figured, what the heck, nobody will ever know. I'll give him a call.
"Good evening, ma'am, how may I help you?
Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy!
Afraid she would lose her nerve if she hesitated, so she rushed right in, "I hear you give a great massage. I'd like you to come to my motel room and give me one. No, wait, should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go at it all night - tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything and everything, I'm ready! Now how does that sound?"
He said, "That sounds absolutely fantastic, but you need to press 9 for an outside line."

Originally Posted by Fifth Columnist

Sorry, but I need to vent !!!!

I experienced the WORST customer service last night at a shop near me, I don't want to mention the name of the store because I'm not in the habit of publicly trashing people or business' (Even if they DO deserve it).

Thursday afternoon I bought something from this store. I paid cash for it. I took it home and found out it didn't work. So last night less than 24 hours later I took it back to the shop and asked if I could get a refund. The girl in the shop told me NO even though I still had the receipt. I asked if I could get a FREE replacement instead then.

Again this person told me "NO." I asked to talk to a manager now as I’m really not happy and I explained that I had just bought the item had got it home and it didn't work. The manager just smiled and told me to my face that I was "OUT OF LUCK." No refund. No FREE replacement. Grrrrrrrrr.

I'll tell you what...I am NEVER buying a lottery ticket from them again.

Solid gold

What does a ********, an Anniversary & a toilet have in common


Men usually miss all 3