Thread: Jokes

I had a hen who could count her own eggs.
She was a mathemachicken.

Today at the bank an old lady asked me to help her check her balance. So i pushed her over.

Rigged polls with preplanned outcomes are useless.


- They really aren't.
- No they're not.

what does carlton footy club and my mobile phone number have in common?

they both start with 0 4

My barber was telling me a good story the other day but there were people waiting so, he cut it short.

Originally Posted by Saitch

My barber was telling me a good story the other day but there were people waiting so, he cut it short.

The joke here being, that you paid for that haircut.

As an aside or short around the ears. What does one pay for a Gentleman's haircut these days? Is it a 2nd Mortgage thing?


NOT A JOKE btw. I haven't been to a Barber for yonks since the time they had Craven A posters on the walls & the olde mantle radio tuned, nay rusted, onto the Racing Radio Stations & blowflies on the mirror.

I'm just curious, as 'err indoors now gives me a regular skim over the top with a #1 & I wondered what I was missing.

No Brylcreem either.

Originally Posted by 4bee

As an aside or short around the ears. What does one pay for a Gentleman's haircut these days? Is it a 2nd Mortgage thing?


NOT A JOKE btw. I haven't been to a Barber for yonks since the time they had Craven A posters on the walls & the olde mantle radio tuned, nay rusted, onto the Racing Radio Stations & blowflies on the mirror.

I'm just curious, as 'err indoors now gives me a regular skim over the top with a #1 & I wondered what I was missing.

No Brylcreem either.

My local (mens only) barber, Tony changes me 20 clams for a basic haircut and a #3 beard trim (and a great chat).