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Thread: Jokes

  1. 10th April 2020, 02:43 PM #5881
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    ramblingboy42
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    2 bananas were lying on a riverbank when a turd came floating by...

    the turd looked over at the 2 bananas and said,"come on in the waters fine"...

    1 banana turned to 2 banana and said, "really...can you believe that ****?"
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  2. 11th April 2020, 09:12 AM #5882
    gofish
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    As if it wasn't bad enough being Dyslexic, now I've got the Racoon virus.
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  3. 11th April 2020, 03:40 PM #5883
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    __1577a21a757140a59ff527bc85d3ec79_width-300.jpeg
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  4. 11th April 2020, 10:50 PM #5884
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    I told my wife that husbands are like wine, they get better with age.


    So she's locked me in the cellar.
    Current Cars:
    2013 E3 Maloo, 350kw
    2008 RRS, TDV8
    1995 VS Clubsport

    Previous Cars:
    2008 ML63, V8
    2002 VY SS Ute, 300kw
    2002 Disco 2, LS1 conversion
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  5. 12th April 2020, 12:40 PM #5885
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eevo View Post
    I told my wife that husbands are like wine, they get better with age.


    So she's locked me in the cellar.

    You lucky, lucky bastard! I hope that happened after you brought in your Autumn/Winter stock of Adelaide Hills Reds? Oh bugger it, whites too.
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  6. 12th April 2020, 06:46 PM #5886
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    Someone threw a huge bottle of Omega 3 pills at me last night.


    I'm fine though, only super fish oil injuries.
    Current Cars:
    2013 E3 Maloo, 350kw
    2008 RRS, TDV8
    1995 VS Clubsport

    Previous Cars:
    2008 ML63, V8
    2002 VY SS Ute, 300kw
    2002 Disco 2, LS1 conversion
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  7. 12th April 2020, 07:06 PM #5887
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    Not long after marrage I took off my wedding ring.
    My wife asked why I dont wear my wedding ring?
    I told her "It cuts of my circulation."
    She said,
    "It's supposed to!"
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  8. 13th April 2020, 02:40 PM #5888
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    Doing the DYI the wife wanted me to do today......

    https://mobile.twitter.com/holdmyale...17882461696001
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  9. 13th April 2020, 06:25 PM #5889
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    This morning I spotted an albino Dalmatian.


    It was the least I could do for the poor thing
    Current Cars:
    2013 E3 Maloo, 350kw
    2008 RRS, TDV8
    1995 VS Clubsport

    Previous Cars:
    2008 ML63, V8
    2002 VY SS Ute, 300kw
    2002 Disco 2, LS1 conversion
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  10. 14th April 2020, 10:22 AM #5890
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    So technically showing up at the bank in a mask and gloves is OK now.
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